Octavia Spencer, Alyson Hannigan, and Mary Louise-Parker have all been named as starring in comedy pilots today—regrettably, not the same comedy pilot, about a team of sassy Atlanta-area interior designers, living, loving, and debating the gender politics of the day. Instead, as a Designing Women remake is probably at least still months away, they’ve all got their own shows. Spencer will rebound from the Angela Lansbury-crushed Murder She Wrote reboot with the Steven Spielberg-produced Fox pilot Red Band Society, starring as a tough-love nurse who oversees a group of kids who become friends in a children’s hospital wing and, presumably, try not to die every week. (It’s like Glee, but with singing replaced by terminal illness!)
How I Met Your Mother star Hannigan could stick around CBS for several more years by taking the co-lead in the Ben Affleck and Matt Damon-produced More Time With Family, starring as the wife to Tom Papa’s overworked dad. And Mary Louise-Parker is getting over the negative Internet comment she read somewhere one time by considering starring in Feed Me, an NBC comedy about a dysfunctional family-run restaurant. Or, we’re just spitballing here, Designing Women reboot, everybody. This generation is sorely bereft of indignant monologues delivered in syrupy Southern accents.