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AMC begins selling movie snacks that won't slowly kill you

America’s relentless war on you just eating whatever the hell you want all the time, until your veins explode in a pressurized spray of corn syrup and hydrogenated oil, has now reached the front lines of the movie theater concession stand. Today Sony issued a press release congratulating AMC for its new Smart MovieSnacks pack, created through a cooperative effort between the theater chain and the Alliance for a Healthier Generation, which is a $7 bag that includes Chiquita Fruit Chipsa natural air-popped corn chips, a bottle of Dasani water, and an Odwalla Chocolate Chip Trail Mix Bar—a much healthier alternative to the usual kind of “trail mix,” where you get a large popcorn, dump some Milk Duds in there, then smother it in artificial butter.

The press release quotes Sony Pictures CEO Michael Lynton’s remarks at ShoWest last year, where he said, “Taking this step is also great for audiences and for your business, because people want to see healthier foods in theaters, and when they do, they’ll buy them.” Which, ha ha, indeed. Still, the fact that the entire snack-pack costs about the same as a large bag of M&Ms suggests he may be onto something.

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