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Between the parachute and the penis, Katy Perry’s had quite a week

(Screenshot: KatyPerryVEVO/YouTube)
(Screenshot: KatyPerryVEVO/YouTube)

This week Katy Perry is proving herself a true aficionado of the great outdoors. Take, for instance, her video for the empowerment jam “Rise.” Perry—sporting a nose ring, some white girl dreads, and an Imperator Furiosa-esque getup—just wants to do some extremely dangerous parachuting, but she’s having some issues getting off the ground:

Really, this video should come with a “do not attempt” warning, because Perry finds herself dangling off a cliff and sinking in a body of water. She finally takes flight, but the ending is ambiguous as the parachute lands with no sign of Perry. Did she ascend to the heavens like Grizabella at the end of Cats? We’ll probably never know.

But really anything she attempts in “Rise” is nothing compared to the other adventure Perry went on this week: She went on a paddle board ride with her extremely naked boyfriend Orlando Bloom. If that doesn’t prove her love of extreme sports, nothing will. You just know she was humming her latest tune the entire time, in part because she found it hilarious like everyone else—“Rise,” get it? —and in part because she needed the strength to persevere.

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