We’ll be taking tomorrow off to celebrate America’s birthday, so our weekend gaming thread is opening up a day early. As always, you can let us in on your gaming plans down in the comments, but I’d also like to share something very special with you today.
Now, some readers will have already heard of this infamous game, but those who haven’t are in for a treat. Embedded below is a speedrun (with cutscenes) of a game called Metal Wolf Chaos taken from the recent Summer Games Done Quick charity marathon. In this game, you play as the American president Michael Wilson—a descendant of Woodrow Wilson, of course—who must take back his country after a coup led by Vice President Richard Hawk leaves the U.S. occupied by futuristic military forces. Luckily, Wilson was able to escape with his giant robot suit, Metal Wolf, intact. Now only he and his secretary, Jodie Crawford, can put a stop to Hawk’s evil reign, which includes acts like reinstating slavery and flooding Chicago with poison gas.
Despite being just about the most American game ever made, Metal Wolf Chaos never came out in America. It was developed and released exclusively for the original Xbox in Japan by From Software. All the dialogue, though, was recorded in English, which is fantastic news because it includes such gems like, “I’ll smash it faster than a Florida recount.” Still, it’s a shame, albeit totally unsurprising, that this baffling piece of satire never saw a stateside release. Getting a copy of your own would be an expensive venture (the lowest price I’ve seen is around $130) and require you to modify an Xbox to play it. So what better way to kill some time this Independence Day weekend than watching someone else play this 100-percent Grade-A American non-American cult classic? You know, in between eating meat and playing with explosives.