Darren Aronofsky’s Noah’s Ark movie is still in the “sit around and talk about it,” "drop hints about Christian Bale" phase, but as the director’s interview with IFC reveals, he’s deadly serious about making it his first genuine “big event film” in the blown-out mold of a Roland Emmerich disaster-piece, only not sucky. And while one may think that Aronofsky is not only an unlikely choice to direct that kind of mega-budget tentpole picture (although the producers of The Wolverine and, previously, Batman Begins obviously didn’t think so), but also a strange candidate to direct a biblical epic, rest assured that Aronofsky doesn’t think the story of Noah has all that much to do with God. “"I don't think it's a very religious story,” Aronofsky said. “I think it's a great fable that's part of so many different religions and spiritual practices.” Is it too early for Christian groups to begin protesting? Maybe begin picking out your colored markers, at least, or coming up with slogans that play off Aronofsky film titles, like "Requiem For A Demon" or "Black Spawn (Of Satan)."