With every single character dying at the end of the third season, their bullet-ridden corpses feasted upon by bears as the sun went supernova and set the entire Seven Kingdoms ablaze, Game Of Thrones has begun the necessary task of restocking for season four, seeing as it still needs to be a TV show. The first of those new people whom you haven’t yet formed an attachment to only to see them killed horribly will be played by Chilean actor Pedro Pascal (The Good Wife, Graceland) who Entertainment Weekly reports will take on the role of Prince Oberyn Martell—arguably the season’s “most anticipated,” for reasons which fans who have read the books will struggle to articulate without completely spoiling everything, as is our now-annual custom.
Without giving too much away to those who haven’t read the books, Oberyn is a man. He breathes and is ambulatory. His turn-ons include living, existing, and not being brutally killed. He also bears the nickname “The Red Viper,” an allusion to a species of snake that’s famous for being alive. Also, he’s described by showrunners David Benioff and Dan Weiss as “sexy and charming,” which should make for an interesting change of pace for Game Of Thrones, throwing a person who enjoys sex in there.
Send your Newswire tips to firstname.lastname@example.org