Rejecting the grim, stately affair that was last year's Billy Crystal-hosted wake, the Oscars have opted for a little more razzle-dazzle, softer shoes and higher kicks, etc. by hiring producers Craig Zadan and Neil Maron, the jazz hand-job creators behind Smash, Chicago, Footloose, and Hairspray. Though the announcement was not accompanied by the naming of a host, because SUSPENSE, this would seem to indicate that the Academy's annual best-laid plans to liven up the ceremony involve less jokes (hence the recent rejection of Jimmy Fallon, Lorne Michaels, and young people) and more of the big, splashy dance and musical numbers that have really lifted the nation's spirits after World War II. And on that note, Zadan and Maron added this to the Academy's statement: "When we filmed The Bucket List, we made our own personal bucket list, and producing the Oscars was No. 1," thereby reminding everyone they've got a history of entertaining the Academy's median demographic.
Send your Newswire tips to firstname.lastname@example.org