Here’s what’s up in the world of television for Sunday, January 12. All times are Eastern.
The 71st Annual Golden Globes (NBC, 8 p.m.): With the help of comedy friends and former Weekend Update co-anchors Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, last year’s Golden Globes ceremony managed to be more than an excuse to gawk at the stars. The boozy, boozy stars. Of course, we at The A.V. Club like to think our Golden Globes livechat had something to do with that transformation—because we’re just as full of ourselves as the famous folk gathering in the Beverly Hilton’s International Ballroom tonight. So grab a cocktail, the computer device of your choosing, and your best gag about Christian Bale’s American Hustle hairpiece and join us here in this international ballroom known as the Internet.
The Simpsons (Fox, 8 p.m.): Yet, even after last year’s well-received telecast, the number of new episodes—and new seasons and new series—debuting tonight indicates that TV still doesn’t take the Golden Globes seriously. Dennis Perkins still hasn’t forgiven the Hollywood Foreign Press Association for awarding Pia Zadora the Best New Star of the Year honor in 1982.
Bob’s Burgers (Fox, 8:30 p.m.): When Tina takes up magic, Pilot Viruet suspects that her take on the “sawing a person in half” trick won’t end with the assistant being reunited with their butt.
Revenge (ABC, 9 p.m.): In the wake of Emily’s amnesia, Carrie Raisler is only one square away from completing her primetime soap bingo card. C’mon previously unknown, long-lost twin!
Family Guy (Fox, 9 p.m.): The Griffins insinuate themselves into the fantastical flights of fancy/horrifying cautionary tales of the Brothers Grimm. To be on the safe side, Eric Thurm advises against associating with any talking wolves you encounter tonight.
True Detective (HBO, 9 p.m.): If you want to start taking bets on who’s going to be in attendance for the 72nd Annual Golden Globes, the stars of HBO’s revolving-door crime series would be a good place to start. Todd VanDerWerff’s going with Matthew McConaughey, while Erik Adams picks Matthew McConaughey’s droopy mustache.
Downton Abbey (PBS, 9 p.m.): The Crawleys are hosting a party tonight, too, though the topic of conversation is less “Is Idris Elba going home with both awards he’s nominated for?” and more “Are any of the gentlemen in attendance going to marry Mary?” Now all Sonia Saraiya can think about is the Dowager Countess’ take on Pacific Rim.
Shameless (Showtime, 9 p.m.): Joshua Alston is reunited with the Gallaghers, and it feels so good—in that intentionally grimy, warts-and-all way that Shameless defines as “good.”
The Good Wife (CBS, 9:30 p.m.): Last week, The Good Wife ripped the “Jonathan Coulton versus Glee” lawsuit from the headlines, leading many fans to lobby for a future take on the Shia LaBeouf plagiarism case. In the meantime, enjoy this week’s drug-smuggling couple case, which, by David Sims’ estimation, was inspired by the box-office success of We’re The Millers.
American Dad (Fox, 9 p.m.): Add another item to this Inventory of fictional Walt Disney surrogates: The Smiths take a vacation to Familyland, where they meet the unthawed, ruthless head of Roy Family. By Kevin McFarland’s estimation, that’s still better than running afoul of Raymond Dieterling.
Girls (HBO, 10 p.m.): Please control your vitriol: The show begins its third season with back-to-back episodes. Todd VanDerWerff calmly reminds you there’s an awards show over here that you can direct your rage at.
TV CLUB CLASSIC
Doctor Who (11 a.m.): Christopher Eccleston heads toward regeneration in a triple header of the Ninth Doctor’s final episodes. And at the end of the article, Alasdair Wilkins will turn into David Tennant, too!
The Simpsons (Classic) (3 p.m.): David Sims solves the mystery of “Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part Two).”
ALSO FROM TV CLUB
TV Reviews, Archer and Chozen: Ahead of a night of animated premieres for FX, David Sims checks in with ISIS and Brandon Nowalk checks out Chozen’s first mixtape. Is there any truth to these crazy “Archer Vice” rumors that have been flying around? Yuuup!
WHAT ELSE IS ON?
The Muppets (Disney, 8 p.m.): Your opportunity to see Globe nominee Amy Adams frolic about with wildly imaginative pieces of fur that aren’t Christian Bale’s American Hustle hairpiece. (NAILED IT.)
Anastasia (TCM, 8 p.m.): Oh, sure, the TV Guide synopsis of this historical drama mentions Ingrid Bergman’s Oscar-winning turn in the title role, but does it mention that she also won a Golden Globe for the performance? Of course not—because the Globes are a joke, a joke The A.V. Club will be making plenty of jokes about tonight, so please tune into the livechat!
NFL Playoff: Chargers at Broncos (CBS, 4:30 p.m.): The debut edition of John Teti’s Block & Tackle has What’s On Tonight eager to see what kind of bolo tie Chargers QB Philip Rivers will wear following the game. Does he go into gameday with two options: One for a win and one for a loss?
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
Enlisted: It took four months, but Les Chappell has found what he considers the best comedy pilot of the TV season: This lovable single-camera effort about a group of Army rejects grinding it out in Florida. If only Fox would’ve shown Enlisted the same faith it showed Dads, Les’ search wouldn’t have worn on for so long.