Family Guy

The general gripe against Family Guy is that it's all jokes, no story. And that formula of wisecracks and sight gags alone can't carry the spin-off game—especially if you have to hear the same dumb voiceover again and again as you race down a liposuction-fat-slicked hospital corridor. Or when you keep sneaking through the same sudsy gay prison shower scene. Or the mini-game where you fart "Yankee Doodle Dandy" in a porta-john. (Okay, that one's funny. Once.)

Family Guy is littered with gags that flop, and knock-offs from the TV show that look terrible—you're playing on the same screen where you watch the show, but Peter's scrotum-chin, Stewie's head, and Brian's ball-licking look drab when they're shrunk down and stiffened-up in a game. And the game itself is as bad as a student Flash project: Brian's stealth missions and Peter's mindless brutality grow tiring the first time you try them. (At least Stewie's platformer levels are fairly entertaining.) The writing is crass enough to earn a "Mature" rating, yet Family Guy plays like it's meant for 6-year-olds. And somehow, watching the characters beat up old people, kids, and women—and you will beat and kill hundreds of women if you want to progress—isn't so hilarious when you're at the controls.

Beyond the game: The Internet features dozens of Flash games that are grosser and more fun than this; start at Newgrounds.com, and check out titles like Dad 'N Me or Sack Smash.

Worth playing for: Fans of the show will enjoy shout-outs to everyone from Quagmire to the greased-up deaf guy. Because that's really why you play video games, isn't it?

Frustration sets in when: Most of the action is aggravating, but Brian's stealth missions are intolerable. In several of his levels, you have to steer him away from trees, or he'll lose control and make you wait while he takes a whiz.

Final judgment: This is worse than that time that they made a cartoon about a Rubik's Cube!

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