Throughout the course of television history, there have been many shows about many different kinds of teen angst: Dorky teen angst (Freaks & Geeks, The Wonder Years), popular teen angst (Beverly Hills 90210), girl detective teen angst (Veronica Mars), show choir teen angst (Glee), cartoon teen angst (Daria), crimson-glow or alternative teen angst (My So-Called Life), etc. Yet there is one kind of teen with yards and yards of angst who has been sadly overlooked by television—his awkward moments undocumented, his pathetic crushes un-over-analyzed, his voiceovers unheard. I'm talking, of course, about teens with freakishly large penises. Where is the show about big-dicked teen angst?
Apparently, it's on MTV:
"Holy crap, dude. I think your dream girl just updated her Facebook status to single! She's probably going to tweet about it later with a #AllTheSingleLadies hashtag! Maybe you can sext her! Tag her in some photos! Profile! Gchat! FarmVille! Vlog!"
"Dude, stop it. What the hell is wrong with you?"
"Oh, sorry. Sometimes when I'm really excited about being a teen, like we both are, I get caught in an endless loop of common teen references and I just can't stop. It's kinda like Millennial Tourette's. ROFL! Justin Bieber! PetVille!"
"Just stop talking!"