Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Wednesday, April 25. All times are Eastern.
America’s Best Dance Crew (MTV, 10 p.m.): You know us, readers. You know we’re not going to lead you astray—all that often, at least. So when we tell you that we really enjoy this here reality show, will you believe us? We like the dancing. We really do. And this show has a lot of high quality choreography, as well as a refreshing lack of celebrities trying to show off their ballroom skills. We added this show quietly a couple of weeks ago, and now Emily Yoshida and Rowan Kaiser are bringing you their mad dance skills. Emily’s got tonight’s installment, and we hope you show up for a little hoofing.
American Idol (Fox, 8 p.m.): Just six singers left, and tonight, they tackle the music of Queen. If we don’t get at least one rendition of “Fat Bottomed Girls,” then this show has probably failed all of us. Claire Zulkey certainly hopes the singers are able to resist “You’re My Best Friend.” Pretty please?
Survivor (CBS, 8 p.m.): Lots of networks are taking tonight off (at least in part), because it’s the last night before May sweeps, when everything will begin its long downhill slide to the end of the TV season. (Is it really that time already?) Fortunately, the gang over at Survivor is all new, and Carrie Raisler is there.
Best Friends Forever (NBC, 8:30 p.m.): Jessica gets back into the dating scene, while Lennon and Joe work to find a little alone time. Hey, did you guys know that Jessica Jardine, who covers this show, has the same name as one of the characters? That’s probably why she likes it! Jessica-based nepotism!
America’s Next Top Model (The CW, 9 p.m.): At first, we didn’t think we’d read this correctly, but, yes, tonight’s episode involves the contestants wearing “heavy Hello Kitty couture gowns.” And while that sounds enthralling, we’re just going to count on Margaret Eby to describe it for us in detail.
Don’t Trust The B---- In Apartment 23 (ABC, 9:30 p.m.): James is cast in a body-switching film, and he’s thrilled about it. Can you imagine the craziness that might have ensued with a Dawson’s Creek body-switching episode? Emily Guendelsberger’s preferred swap would have been Pacey and Gran.
Revenge (ABC, 10 p.m.): Emily uncovers the identity of her father’s killer. We’re going to bet it was Phil Dunphy from Modern Family, if only because there’s a show that could use Emily’s unique skillsets every once in a while. Carrie Raisler hopes she escapes her own reality and starts visiting other shows entirely.
South Park (Comedy Central, 10 p.m.): After our friend told us about the terrifying world of South Park slash-fiction this weekend, we sincerely hope that tonight’s episode—in which Cartman apparently finds love—doesn’t provide more fuel for that particular fire. Ryan McGee, sadly, knows this is a false hope.
TV CLUB CLASSIC
The Sopranos (1 p.m.): Tony’s in a coma, and that means it’s time for him to wander a California landscape that seems suspiciously like the Catholic idea of Purgatory. Todd VanDerWerff has never been in a coma, but he bets if he ever was, he’d just spend his time commenting on Purgatory Club articles.
WHAT ELSE IS ON
The Tiniest Girl In The World (Discovery Fitness And Health, 8 p.m.): On nights when there’s not very much on, we can always turn to DFH to get us through a particularly empty What’s On Tonight. Tonight: The parents of a 2-year-old girl who weighs but seven pounds avoid references to the Will Smith movie.
American Guns (Discovery, 9 p.m.): True to its name, this is a series about American firing guns. In tonight’s second season premiere, the team builds a punt gun. We don’t even know what that is, but we’re going to just assume that once they’re done, the good times roll.
Total Blackout (Syfy, 10 p.m.): Remember when you were a kid and went to a party, and there was always that game involving sitting in a dark room and sticking your hand into a bowl and feeling something gross and being told it was eyeballs? This is that, the TV show. Will Harris investigates.
Ugly Americans (Comedy Central, 10:30 p.m.): We know a bunch of you are fans of this one. We know it airs its second season finale tonight. We know that we should cover it more regularly. We’re hoping to get somebody on it tonight, but if we don’t, you can always invade the South Park comments, as usual.
Multiplicity (Encore, 8 p.m.): What’s better than one Michael Keaton? Like, 500 Michael Keatons? Anyway, this ‘90s “comedy” clearly doesn’t understand how cloning works, since the scientists don’t have to find hundreds of surrogate mothers to give birth to little Keaton babies. Stupid ‘90s movies!
Sweepings/Jalna (TCM, 8 p.m.): We have no idea what either of these movies are about, but the descriptions make them sound fascinating, they’re both from the mid-1930s, and they’re each only 90 minutes long, which means you won’t waste too much time if they suck. Why not give them a shot?
NBA Basketball: Clippers at Knicks (ESPN, 8 p.m.): Our Clippers fandom began as a reactionary attempt to strike back at everyone in our California home being Lakers fans, but in recent years, it’s become largely genuine, thanks to the teams steady improvement. Oh, and the Knicks have Jeremy Lin.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
Frontline (Tuesday): Meredith Blake and the Frontline producers are on hand to explain to you just why the world economy collapsed and why it’s taking so long to recover. Of course, we think the answer it’s taking so long to recover is because you’re not buying us enough presents. Go! Revive the economy!