Break out those LSD tabs, kids, because the vaguely psychedelic children’s board game Candy Land is coming to the big screen! Lord Licorice, Queen Frostine, Mr. Mint, Gramma Nut, Princess Lolly, and all your favorites will guide you through the wondrously sweet world of your toddling years. But beware the Molasses Swamp and be sure to dodge the sexual predators that no doubt lurk in the Peanut Brittle House. Or something like that.
Somehow, the moviemaking professionals behind this insane project—Tropic Thunder screenwriter Etan Cohen and Enchanted director Kevin Lima—will figure out how to eke 90 minutes of fairytale hokum out of the ancient board game. Part of Universal’s deal with the Hasbro (which may also bring us Ridley Scott’s Monopoly, and movies based on Battleship and Ouija), Candy Land will no doubt attract the very young and tap into the lucrative acid freak demographic. Can Yahtzee: The Movie (in 3D) be far behind?
Send your Newswire tips to email@example.com