Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Thursday, Dec. 8. All times are Eastern.
Community (NBC, 8 p.m.): C’mon, you didn’t honestly think I was going to pick something else tonight, did you? You didn’t think that I was going to sit there and try and make up some bullshit about how you should watch The Office when we all know that this show is leaving us for a few months? You didn’t think I’d just ignore a terrific and fun episode, one that will have you hoping the show will come back sooner, rather than later? You didn’t think I would abandon this show on Christmas, did you? And you didn’t think I, Todd VanDerWerff, would be so haughty as to speak in third person while I’m bidding this one adieu. C’mon, guys. You know me better than that.
The Big Bang Theory (CBS, 8 p.m.): Hyuk, hyuk, Sheldon might break something and then say, “Guess the Force isn’t with me!” And it doesn’t matter that I agree with Oliver Sava that this is still an oft-solid comedy. Its success is still pissing me off.
The X Factor (Fox, 8 p.m.): I would make a joke about how watching this instead of Community would be stupid, but I already know that none of you are watching this, which means Emily Yoshida has turned the comments sections into Thunderdomes.
Parks And Recreation (NBC, 8:30 p.m.): Okay, this one’s on after Community, so you’re cleared to watch it. Plus, it’s a really nice and light and sweet Christmas episode, just like Steve Heisler used to make when he was still making such things.
The Office (NBC, 9 p.m.): The Office celebrates another Christmas, but it’s worth pointing out that the show has done a lot of really good Christmas episodes in the past. Also worth pointing out: I am actually Myles McNutt. Surprise ending.
Beavis And Butt-Head (MTV, 10 p.m.): I’ve been waiting for the episode where Beavis tries to photocopy his ass on the school’s copy machine since I saw the press still pop up. Here’s hoping that it doesn’t disappoint us, but especially Kenny Herzog.
Burn Notice (USA, 10 p.m.): Sounds like somebody on staff saw the movie Blood Diamond recently, because here’s a whole episode about, uh, diamond smuggling. Killing time before the finale, I guess. Spoiler alert: I am also Scott Von Doviak.
Grimm (NBC, 10 p.m.): This is the timeslot of Hill Street Blues. This is the timeslot of L.A. Law. This is the timeslot of ER. This is the timeslot of The Marriage Ref. And now NBC’s trying out a fairy tale procedural? Even Kevin McFarland is upset!
It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (FX, 10 p.m.): Every sitcom worth its salt has done a “school reunion” episode, so here’s Sunny’s take on the familiar storyline. While we’ve got space to kill here, I’d just like to say first person is really liberating.
The League (FX, 10:30 p.m.): Eliza Dushku turns up in this one, which will mean lots of people in comments insisting that Eliza Dushku can act. Spoiler alert: She can’t, not really. I’m not Margaret Eby, but you probably figured that out already.
TV CLUB CLASSIC
Star Trek: The Next Generation (11 a.m.): Zack Handlen is so close to the end that he can just about taste it. And this week, he’ll be serenading a poster of Jean-Luc Picard with Boyz II Men’s classic “It’s So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday.”
Seinfeld (1 p.m.): You would think I’m David Sims, since we’re both super-clever and devilishly handsome, but I’m not. He checks into the episode titled “The Andrea Doria” this week, and have you ever seen photos of that wreck? Really freaky, huh?
Cheers (3 p.m.): This week, the other writers and I—but mostly you should be paying attention to my insights—talk about a couple of episodes, including one that’s very off-model for what the show would do going forward.
TV CLUB ADVENT CALENDAR
‘Twas The Night Before Christmas (Wednesday): The process of editing these has driven me to a kind of madness, as I get the songs stuck in my head. Nothing’s done it quite like Will Harris evoking the spirit of “Even A Miracle Needs A Hand.”
WHAT ELSE IS ON?
Dawn Of The Nazis (National Geographic, 8 p.m.): I assume this is one of those boring old World War II documentaries, but I’d like to believe it’s a movie about how Nazism spread because one guy got infected and then started biting other people.
Wipeout: Deck The Balls/America’s Funniest Home Videos Christmas Spectacular/The Great Big American Auction (ABC, 8/9/10 p.m.): And in December 2011, the American Broadcasting Corporation pretty much just gave up.
Becoming Santa (OWN, 9 p.m.): Here’s a documentary about some guy’s attempts to become a mythical man, stemming from folklore. I’d say good luck with that, but it’s on Oprah’s network, and she can make anything happen.
Big Shrimpin’ (History, 10 p.m.): Phew. After last night saw the channel airing that Pearl Harbor documentary, I was worried that it was done airing shows about working-class folks and people who live in swamps. Glad to see that’s not the case.
Beautiful Girls (IFC, 8 p.m.): Here’s a pretty good movie that deserves to be better seen, even if it features Rosie O’Donnell at the height of her dark powers. Anyway, Timothy Hutton stars, and Natalie Portman plays the adorable kid next door.
My Man Godfrey (TCM, 11:30 p.m.): TCM’s showing William Powell movies all night, but since it’s Thursday and you stay up late on Thursday—I know I do—why not stick around for this wondrous comedic confection?
Golf: Dubai World Championship (Golf, 6:30 p.m.): Jesus Christ, people who watch golf. This is 300 minutes long. Look, I used to think I was wasting my life watching this much shitty television, but you guys… I don’t even know anymore.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
Up All Night (Wednesday): Erik Adams was present for baby Amy’s first Christmas, and he wasn’t all that impressed. But Erik! Babies! And Christmas! What I’m saying is this: Erik Adams? Not such a fan of babies. Don’t tell him I told you.