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Lifetime no longer wants to look at Roseanne's Nuts

Ha ha. "Nuts."

As first announced on Roseanne Barr’s scarily compulsively updated Twitter feed, Lifetime has passed on a second season of Roseanne’s Nuts, its searing exposé on the plight of independent macadamia nut farmers who also happen to be mostly retired comediennes with personality disorders, no doubt because of pressure from the shady lobbyist forces of Big Macadamia Nut who want to keep everything corporate. Also, its abysmally low ratings, which suggests that not many people were interested in watching Roseanne Barr hunt pigs and talk about her menopausal sex life. Still, Roseanne's Nuts succeeded in getting Barr back in front of cameras, thus giving her the confidence to consider new projects such as a potential return to sitcoms, running for president, creating brain-teasing SAT analogies like “any country that allows child marriage : pedophile = babylon =guillotines,” and most recently, campaigning to be Prime Minister of Israel “as the physical manifestation of the goddess Isis and the reincarnation of Cleopatra.” Wait, why didn’t we watch her reality show again?

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