Until now, setting upon the corpse of Michael Jackson like a pack of jackals, savagely tearing it to pieces, and then scattering those fragments to the winds has been the sole province of the Jackson estate. But now you too can own a tiny sad little chunk of Jacksonania with the new Michael Jackson Trading Card Set from Panini America, a leading manufacturer of collectible memorabilia and not, in fact, a sketchy airport sandwich shop. Two years ago the company purchased at auction many of the outfits that Jackson had worn in famous TV appearances throughout the early 1970s—on everything from Soul Train to The Flip Wilson Show—and having rescued them from the dustbin of history, cut them up with scissors, then taped the scraps to trading cards. Starting next week at both Target stores and at the official website, you can begin buying these bits of fabric that Panini describes as “history-soaked,” which is also gross. Collect them all and put them next to your Michael Jackson Hair Diamonds, and then he will come back to life and sing you a song and be your magical ghost friend forever.
Send your Newswire tips to email@example.com