Photoshop is not a renewable resource. It can only be mined from two places on Earth—underneath Sanrio headquarters in Japan, and behind the mirrored wall in the living room of Mariah Carey's NYC apartment—and once those resources are spent, it's only a matter of time before we run out of Photoshop forever. Imagine that: A world without Photoshop, where people look like people instead of shiny, vaguely human-esque lollipops, where skin looks like skin instead of melted crayons, and where your grandchildren will be forced to look upon Shia LeBoeuf's unobscured crow's feet on the covers of magazines. It is a crepey, saggy, honest future almost too hideous to comprehend.
Which is why it's now more important than ever to decrease our Photoshop dependency and develop alternative forms of image manipulation, like permanent markers and fire. We should all be striving to reduce our Photoshop footprints, because there's only so much of that precious magic to go around.
Unfortunately, no one explained any of this to Kimora Lee Simmons before she started working on the ad for her new perfume, Dare Me.
Either Kimora Lee Simmons used up all the world's Photoshop, or she found a photographer that could somehow take a picture of the hot pink chaos that's inside her brain.