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Red 2

 August 1, 2013

Like its predecessor, whose nearly $200 million gross automatically generated this sequel, Red 2 seems to exist solely as a reason for a certain strata of celebrities to just sort of hang out—an Expendables with less visible straining, a Grown-Ups with more guns, etc. Similarly, your enjoyment will likely depend on your own lowered expectations: If you’re amused by the juxtaposition of Bruce Willis’ still-retired, still extremely dangerous CIA agent shopping for denture cream (Side note: What?), and his Costco trip with hostage-turned-girlfriend Mary-Louise Parker being rudely interrupted by more of John Malkovich and Helen Mirren’s spy games, then you’ll likely enjoy another round of this as much as the actors appear to—which is to say, sort of, why not, there’s nothing else going on this week. Maybe just don’t think about the fact that Bruce Willis is starring in this same movie at least three times next year. Anyway, this time Catherine Zeta-Jones and Anthony Hopkins join in on the inertia fun, which is further livened up by even more explosions and some European scenery. They’re old people and they’re using guns! [Runs gibbering into the night, because of the incongruity.]