Barely a day after it was announced that James McTeigue plans to remake Bloodsport, sort of, now Deadline reveals that similar plans are in the works to remake Jean-Claude Van Damme’s Kickboxer, as well as basically that entire summer in junior high you spent just hanging out riding bikes and watching HBO at your friend Brent’s house. Director Stephen Fung is behind the redo, having impressed U.S. producers with his Chinese box-office hit Tai Chi Zero, his stylistic take on martial-arts action, and his surprisingly deep understanding of those lazy months you and Brent must have watched Bloodsport and Kickboxer, like, 20 times, just because they were always on, in between trying to light your farts and playing WWF Wrestlemania. (Until Brent got pissed when you body-slammed his Honky Tonk Man, like a big baby. Why'd you even pick Honky Tonk Man then?!)
Deadline promises “a new take” on Kickboxer, albeit one that will still likely concern a Muay Thai fighter out for vengeance, along with an updated version of that old fight you and Brent used to have over whether Kickboxer was better than Bloodsport—a fight you can soon look forward to seeing updated, for an all-new generation.
Send your Newswire tips to firstname.lastname@example.org