Safe

March 2, 2012

Fresh from the lab of scientists tasked with concocting new formulas to get Jason Statham to punch people, Safe promises pure, unfiltered Jason-Statham-punching-people concentrate with precious little waste. Admirably, it even recycles a bit, essentially borrowing the basic framework of Mercury Rising—in which Bruce Willis (the early model Jason Statham) protects a young, autistic math whiz from assassins—and applies it to a just slightly different story about Statham’s retired elite ass-kicking agent protecting a young, Asian math whiz from assassins, who are out to kill her over her extraordinary aptitude for remembering things.

But of course, that’s just the framework for a whole lot of Jason Statham just being Jason Statham—picking elaborate fights on the subway, having elaborate car chases, elaborating on the size of his balls—while he and his young charge evade a rogues gallery of Asian and Russian gangsters, plus a gaggle of corrupt cops, just for the sake of being totally inclusive. Fortunately, the trailer wastes no time in getting to the goods, peaking with a lengthy, standout sequence where seemingly everyone in New York City locks and loads their guns in a glorious, clickity clackity symphony. It’s easily the most Jason Statham movie of Jason Statham movies since the last Jason Statham movie.

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