A.V. Club Most Read

News Newswire Great Job, Internet!
TV Club All Reviews What's On Tonight
Video All Video A.V. Undercover A.V. Cocktail Club Film Club
Reviews All Reviews Film TV Music Books
Features All Features Wiki Wormhole AVQ&A
Sections Film Tv Music Food Comedy Books Games Aux
Our Company About Us Contact Advertise Privacy Policy Careers RSS
Onion Inc. Sites The Onion The A.V. Club ClickHole Onion Studios
Get The Latest

Sharknado merchandise to hit the world like a devastating tornado of sharks

Today in news that seems specifically designed to encourage headlines like the one you see above, SyFy has announced that it’s doing the most obvious thing since making a sequel to Sharknado: making a ton of merchandise based on said sequel. 

This comes via The Hollywood Reporter, which says that SyFy is ramping up the Sharknado merchandise machine in honor of its sequel’s premiere on July 30. Partnering with a merchandising agency called Earthbound, SyFy is prepared to unleash a veritable tornado of Sharknado crap, including “jewelry, Halloween costumes, towels, backpacks, swim trunks, mobile accessories, shot glasses and, soon, slot machines.” Yes, this October, you might be able to dress as Steve Sanders with a chainsaw for Halloween. Everyone will still think that’s a funny reference by then!

SyFy is reportedly shipping out merchandise to more than 1,000 retail outlets, including Kmart, Wal-Mart, and Hot Topic—a store that seems to have been founded just for this specific occasion. Black shirts featuring pop-culture references that a lot of people will get but very few will think are funny, just so goth/emo kids can act like they’re making some kind of boring statement? They might as well put that on the sign. 

Also, pushing merchandise this hard just because of some ironic Internet buzz? Did we learn nothing from Snakes On A Plane?

Submit your Newswire tips here.