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Showtime renews Weeds, as it ever shall be

Determined, as always, to keep everything perfectly preserved just so, Showtime has renewed its longest-running comedy Weeds for an eighth season, confirming the deal from within a dank, heavily draped office lined with stopped clocks and a desk topped by a rat-infested cake. “We are happy to be on the vanguard of comedy with the groundbreaking new series Weeds,” a Showtime executive probably said, as he’s said every year since 2005, as a copy of The Black Eyed Peas’ “Let’s Get It Started” played behind him in a perpetual loop. “We look forward to the many adventures to come from suburban mom pot dealer Nancy Botwin.” Construction of the eighth season’s contrivances will begin early next year, and presumably spin ever onward from there, as there’s seemingly no end to where the show can go—especially now that Nancy’s kids are old enough to screw everything up by sleeping with guest stars, and Shane is a cop now or what the fuck ever.

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