Following yesterday’s news that Universal has thrown out nearly all of its Hasbro toys unopened, the properties have been rescued from the local Goodwill and begun finding homes at new studios, who will care for them properly—or, in the case of Candy Land, use it as a playground for their Adam Sandler doll with kung-fu farting action. Deadline reports that Columbia has picked up the film set in the mythical, color-recognition-skill-shaping land of Gum Drop Mountains and fudge-based feudalism, abandoning earlier plans for it to be “Lord Of The Rings, but with candy” and rebuilding it as an Adam Sandler movie more along the lines of "Bedtime Stories, but with more product placement." In Candy Land terms, this is sort of like stopping the game by overturning the board in frustration, and instead trying to shove as many of those little gingerbread men as you can up your butt.
Enchanted director Kevin Lima is still attached, while Sandler and Robert Smigel are in talks to rewrite the screenplay, presumably starting from scratch on a draft that has already passed through Tropic Thunder's Etan Cohen and Alvin And The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel's Jonathan Aibel and Glenn Berger. And although the announcement doesn’t specify what part Sandler will eventually play, it does mention that it’s “larger than life,” suggesting either Sandler will be the father of a family that finds itself trapped in Candy Land and who will intermittently shout things, or that he will play one or perhaps several of the many established Candy Land characters like Lord Licorice or even Gramma Nutt, who will intermittently shout things. The decision will likely come down to which role would allow him to wear cargo shorts.
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