A.V. Club Most Read

News Newswire Great Job, Internet!
TV Club All Reviews What's On Tonight
Video All Video A.V. Undercover A.V. Cocktail Club Film Club
Reviews All Reviews Film TV Music Books
Features All Features Spoiler Space TV Club
Sections Film Tv Music Food Comedy Books Games Aux
Our Company About Us Contact Advertise Privacy Policy Careers RSS
Onion Inc. Sites The Onion The A.V. Club ClickHole Onion Studios

The Expendables 2

August 17, 2012

Acknowledging its existence as the action movie equivalent of a fantasy football league or YouTube mash-up, this teaser trailer for The Expendables 2 does little more than trot out all the last-name-only badasses of yesterday and today (plus Liam Hemsworth), all calculated to make your inner 15-year-old boy totally stoked. And if you want a coherent plot, you’ll have to wait—possibly forever—until Stallone and company get done posing with their guns and walking away from things in slow motion. But let’s be honest here: That's sort of the point. This is, after all, a movie whose logo involves a metal skull getting stabbed in the eyes with knives, and then said skull sprouts wings made out of even more knives and some guns. It's like the nation’s movie theaters are a school desk, and Stallone is just gonna carve that shit right in there.