The new Dallas ad invites you to shower with all the Ewings, whether you want to or not

The new Dallas ad invites you to shower with all the Ewings, whether you want to or not

In marketing its upcoming Dallas reboot/continuation, TNT has to appeal to the nostalgic memories of old fans while also attracting newer and younger viewers. Hence, this recently debuted promotional art that winks at one of the original series’ most famous plot twists/fuck yous—Patrick Duffy rising from the dead, revealing that the entire preceding season was a dream—while at the same time making an even more salacious wink at the kids by featuring one of those sexy family group showers they dig so much.

Get soapy with Grandpa!” the tagline does not read but also does, basically, while proclaiming the return of one of TV’s campiest rich-people-fighting dramas by putting two generations of Ewings in towels and nothing else—save Larry Hagman’s J.R., who doesn’t take off his hat for nothin’, let alone a piddlin’ shower. You’ll notice the 80-year-old Hagman still looks pissed off and humiliated, despite the fact that his head was flown in from someplace far away from these semi-incestuous shenanigans, which are a nexus of so many clashing Photoshopped elements from different spaces and times, it could serve as an illustration of string theory. That might be a more effective use for this, actually.