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Watch Janie Haddad Tompkins attempt to steal Masterpiece Classic from Laura Linney

For anyone who’s ever dreamt of supplanting that hack Laura Linney as the host of Masterpiece Classic, Janie Haddad Tompkins has just released a video laying out a potentially viable plan. Just get “A Lawyer” (a.k.a. comedian and Haddad Tompkins’ husband, Paul F. Tompkins) to issue an injunction ordering director Joel Spence to film more introductions. Unfortunately for Haddad Tompkins, she cracks under the pressure, or gets too distracted by Instagram, or forgets the name of the show and proves ultimately unable to deliver her lines before “Council Retained by Laura Linney” (a.k.a. Patton Oswalt) shows up to shut the whole thing down. And of course, it arrives just in time for the return of Downton Handgun—uh, Abbey—this Sunday.

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