According to Risky Business, Paramount Pictures is looking to remake The Hunchback Of Notre Dame as a “high-concept action-adventure story” in the vein of Pirates Of The Caribbean, taking the basic “framework” of Victor Hugo’s novel and adding in “original” elements, which is most likely code for “explosions.” Details are under wraps at the moment, although we can tell you that it’s being produced by Lorenzo Di Bonaventura’s company—most recently responsible for Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen and G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra—so you already know that story will come first. We can also tell you that it’s based on a pitch from rookie screenwriters Willie Block and Jake Emanuel, who first came to the studio’s attention with an action-comedy spec script called Fuck You I Win. Also, they look like this. This does not bode well.