"Beer For My Horses" Movie Is A July 4th Miracle

Every July 4th Eve (aka July 3rd) for as long as she can remember, young Rose has put her head down in the modest, though happy, home she shares with her poor, though happy, family and dreamt of waking up to find an extravagant BBQ with grilled hot dogs and hamburgers as far as the eye can see, and a massive fireworks display--complete with some of those fancy smiley-face fireworks--lighting up the night sky. Also, Rose dreamed that there would be a movie adaptation of the Toby Keith song, "Beer For My Horses" starring Ted Nugent, cause she thoroughly enjoyed the song when it came out in 2003, and Rose is a big fan of hunting and ridiculousness.

Of course, Rose's family was far too poor (but happy!) to make the big BBQ and fancy fireworks dream come true, and Beer For My Horses: The Movie was obviously very far-fetched even as a made-for-CMT movie, so every July 4th Rose would wake up to a box of soggy sparklers and a July 4th "feast" of boiled Western Beef hot dogs (no bun) to share with her poor (though happy!) family. It wasn't much, but Rose knew that July 4th wasn't just about getting things, it was about giving them, and sharing them with family.

So, last July 4th, when a scruffy vagrant in tattered cowboy hat and worn boots turned up in young Rose's backyard, instead of shooing him away with a broom, Rose shared her last soggy sparkler with the man, and even gave him half of a boiled Western Beef hot dog, which by then was pretty cold and barely edible. Little did young Rose know that scruffy vagrant was Toby Keith, and her one small act of kindness would lead to a July 4th miracle. Behold: the 'splosion n' shootin'-filled trailer for the movie that shouldn't be, Beer For My Horses.

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Save a little excitement for the big screen, Toby Keith. You don't want to put all your guys-in-hilarious-underwear eggs in the teaser-trailer basket.

Happy July 4th Eve, everyone!