Miley Cyrus

All those years of jokes about country has-been Billy Ray Cyrus, and now it seems the one-hit-wonder has finally gotten the last laugh—and, worse, through the most vulnerable part of society, our children. Unleashing his chirpy, ever-smiling prodigy Miley into the ears of America’s kids on the Disney Channel smash-hit show Hannah Montana, Cyrus has bred the ultimate vessel of teenybopper tunes. Tragically, tainting the nation’s next generation isn’t enough: Miley Cyrus actually can sing, and the songs written for her are perfect preadolescent pop nuggets, meaning few parents or otherwise sane adults can resist the urge to hum pap like “Party In The U.S.A.” and the like after unloading the kids at soccer practice.

Updated 09/29/2009