Blog Don’t be a dick to the bus

More than 1.01 million people take the CTA Bus every single day—about 400,000 more than take the train. There are 140 bus routes, 11,577 posted bus stops, and 1,782 buses in Chicago. Combined, those 1,782 buses travel 172,991 miles a day. And still, people are assholes to the bus.

Actually, it’s not just to the bus—it’s on the bus. As 2011 begins, let’s make a resolution, Chicago, for the sanity of millions of people: Let’s all stop being a dick about the bus.

There are a few things everyone can do—other than not smelling bad—to make those treacherous and tedious rides more enjoyable for those 1.01 million people riding the bus every day. They’re common sense, but it’s nice to be reminded of them from time to time. After all, even the most pious of bus riders—this reporter included—slips up sometime.

For the love of God, cars, please let the bus over.
It’s simple math, right? Any passenger car holds, at most, six people. No fronting, though: During the morning commute, most cars haul one person. Of course all those people have somewhere to go—but so do the passengers on the bus. Plus, there are maybe 30 to 75 people in winter coats crammed on a bus, mostly standing up and bumping into each other precariously. 75 people on a bus trump one person in a car, period.

It sucks, yes, to be stuck behind a slow bus, but that’s what drivers get in Chicago. It’s a major city with major public transportation. Driving on streets with bus routes—that’s part of the deal. Don’t like the bus? Move somewhere without buses.

So, let the damn bus over, drivers. (And this means you, Chicago Ave. commuters.) It’s good karma. Plus, you can just scoot around them when they pull over to a stop in two blocks anyway.

Let older people sit down. Duh.
This one should go without saying, but once you’ve seen an old man crack his head open on the Kimball bus because no one would let him sit down, it bears repeating. If someone looks even a little bit older than you, ask if they want your seat. Don’t let an old lady—or a pregnant lady—wander sadly to the middle or back of the bus while everyone tries not to look her in the eye. You’ll have to stand up for maybe five minutes. Just bite the bullet and give up your seat.

Move to the back.
The bus driver says it because he or she means it. Move to the back, suckers. Everyone wants to get out at the train stop quickly, but everyone’s lives are a lot better when they have more room. This is especially true when everyone’s wearing boots, winter coats, and carrying backpacks—or when a bus appears to be so full to the driver that they’re forced to pass up people waiting at stops, even though it’s 9 degrees out, and there’s plenty of room in the back of the bus that they can’t see, even with their big mirrors.

Again, it’s karma. Move to the back, and if someone’s in front of you, not moving, and you can’t get around them, either ask them to move, or ask them if you can go around them. No one minds when people ask nicely, in theory.

Wait your turn.
This one might be easier said that done—and maybe it’s just this reporter’s pet peeve—but it’s absolute madness when, in a crowded bus, people start fighting to get to the doors two stops in advance before a stop where you can transfer to a train. Take the Chicago bus at Milwaukee, for example. Everyone’s going to get off. People who aren’t getting off are forced into the laps of strangers. Bags go in faces. No one can switch to the newly emptied seats. It’s just madness.

Wait your turn. Sure, that split second might make you just miss the train, but that’s sort of the price of public transportation admission, right?