News Net Groupon falls into the Gap, makes a shit-ton of money in one day, expands into Russia and Japan

Since sifting through dull newspapers, hyperbolic blogs, and overflowing RSS feeds for meaningful news can be an arduous process, News Net catches and compiles both the amusing and the significant reports that were overlooked throughout the workweek. Here are some things to think about as the weekend begins.

• It was a big week for the local bajillionaires behind Groupon. On Thursday, the company offered its first national deal, partnering with Gap. The $25 for $50 worth of product offer was so blandly appealing that it crashed Groupon’s servers as the company sold 10 Groupons per second. At that rate, it was on pace to sell 700,000 Groupons by the end of the day, or about $17.5 million in revenues. Not too bad for a Thursday. Hope employee lunch was on the company today.

• Earlier in the week, Groupon bought two international competitors—Russia’s Darberry Inc. and Japan’s Qpod Inc. They plan to rename both Groupon, and start hocking bargain basement noodle shop deals and Russian haircuts very soon.

• Another local Internet pioneer, Epitonic.com, is back. The music site launched in 1999 as one of the first places to get free label-approved MP3s on the Internet before petering out in 2004. It's back in the game now, assuming it can scrape up $4,650 on Kickstarter by Oct. 1. So far, the site has 22 backers pledging $1,545.

• Big shock: Chicago just broke the record for the most 80-degree days in a row—45—and it’s the ninth-warmest summer on record since meteorologists started tracking these things in 1871. The high temperatures exceeded 90 more than 20 days this year, and Midway Airport has counted 29 days with lows at or above 70 degrees this summer, twice the normal average. So, yes, it’s okay to be this sweaty.

• Another total shocker: CTA buses get in a lot of accidents. On average, at least one bus a day is involved in a collision, making the CTA the sketchiest public bus line in America’s big cities. Last year, the city’s buses were involved in 271 “reportable collisions, “ meaning the accidents resulted in “$25,000 or more in property damage or at least one individual taken to a hospital.” Of course, the bus fleet made over 9.3 million runs last year, so the average isn’t too bad, realistically.

• Rick Bayless is opening two Bayless-y restaurants at O’Hare this fall. No word on what they’ll actually be serving, but it’s a nice step toward localizing airport cuisine—if airport cuisine is actually a thing.

• Speaking of, uh, travelers, it looks like McCormick Place’s trade-show crisis is waning. Several national conventions were threatening to take their business elsewhere in response to the convention center’s labor regulations, but those rules have been loosened, resulting in five current trade shows and three new shows committing to McCormick Place. That convention business should result in an estimated $700 million in direct spending to the city and state, including super-long lines at all of Rick Bayless’ restaurants when the National Restaurant Association show is in town.

• In career-advancement news: Mo Ryan, who until recently was the Chicago Tribune’s television critic extraordinaire, has left the paper and will be blogging for AOL starting Sept. 1; Q101’s Kevin Manno’s last day on the air will be Aug. 25, after which he’ll be moving to New York City to work for MTV, hosting what seems like it could become TRL-redux. (He’s not doing interviews, but he did tweet that the show would be live at 5 p.m. every weekday starting Sept. 20.); and Riot Fest founder Mike Petryshyn has taken a job as the Head Talent Buyer for the Congress Theater.