Layover chow 

For some, the anticipation of seeing loved ones is enough to keep up morale amid the taxing routine of air travel. But when the chaotic crowds, screaming children, weird smells, and inevitable delays become too much, it might be time to give in to the wretched comforts of airport food. Luckily, there’s more to concourse dining than just waiting in line at McDonald’s or the shitty mini-Chili’s locations. The A.V. Club cobbled together this guide for anyone who ends up stuck at airports in Chicago, Madison, Milwaukee, or the Twin Cities this season.

Chicago: O’Hare and Midway
If you're in a rush: O’Hare's Café Zoot serves coffee, sandwiches, quesadillas, and ice cream. Not only that, but it’s quick, easy, and delicious—the exact opposite of commercial flying. Midway's Superdawg is airport copy of the Northwest Side’s famed hot-dog drive-in. Poodle skirts and roller skates are extra.
If you want to faux fancy dine: O’Hare's Berghoff Café offers a taste of a real Chicago classic. Plus, the full bar is stocked with The Berghoff’s own brew if you just want to forget about your crazy relatives. Midway's Miller’s Pub is known for its Canadian-style ribs, a food that straddles messy and classy, and Miller’s “always double” burgers offer another option for expanding the waistlines of fancy fliers.
If you just want a goddamn drink: O’Hare's Goose Island Brewing Company: some of the best suds in Chicago. Feel like a local, drink like a pilot. Midway's Halstead St. Tap is dressed up like the ’40s, so if you can’t escape where you are, you can at least escape when you are.

Madison: Dane County Regional Airport
If you're in a rush: Caffe Ritazza is a plasticky bistro that serves pre-made salads, lonely fresh fruit, and a bevy of saran-wrapped muffins and sweet breads. For the thirsty, espressos and juices are perfect for gulping while sprinting to your terminal. Caffe Ritazza can’t provide authentic ambience, but a massive photo mural of three people looking far more cheery than a cup of coffee should ever make anyone adorns the wall.
If you want to faux fancy dine: DCRA has only seven restaurants, so finding “fancy” in any form is no simple task. That said, Usinger’s Wurst German Bar serves many bratwurst variations (regular, Cajun, cheddar), along with “exotic” sausages like chorizo. For delayed travelers stuck in the airport time-warp, breakfast is served all day.
If you just want a goddamn drink: Hangdog businessmen nursing drinks are so common in airport bars, it’s almost as if they’re a required interior design element. The airport outlet of Madison’s own Great Dane Pub does its best to class up the riff-raff with wooden tables and booths, a mahogany bar, and beer from one of the better microbreweries in Madison. If suds are too slow-working to dull the travel angst, Great Dane also offers a nice selection of whiskies, brandies, and above-average (and sometimes even delicious) pub-style food.

Minneapolis: Minneapolis-St. Paul International
If you're in a rush: Great River Market & Deli sells fresh daily soups, fast frou-frou salads and sandwiches, and ingredients in the “cranberry pecan chicken” to “portabella” range, with chocolate fixes to go.
If you want to faux-fancy dine: French Meadow Bakery & Café for vegan chili, organic butternut squash ravioli, and an antioxidant martini (really).
If you just want a goddamn drink: Rock Bottom Brewery, at Concourse C, serves up decent, handcrafted micro-brews. O’Gara’s, at Concourse F, delivers whiskey straight-up and Irish coffee that’ll give travelers both the jitters and the whirlies on their outbound flights.

Milwaukee: General Mitchell International Airport
If you're in a rush: Milwaukee's airport positions itself as a kinder, gentler alternative to the manic clusterfuck of Chicago's airports. But big-city travelers used to a plethora of dining options might be a little disappointed by all the Cinnabons and Pizza Hut Expresses dotting Mitchell International Airport's concourses. If you need something quick, your best bet is grabbing a muffin from Starbucks. It will totally be unlike all the muffins you've bought at all the other Starbuckses in your life.
If you want to faux-fancy dine: If "fancy" is defined as "reasonably unique and regional," you can't go wrong with the Usinger's stand. There's nothing like downing a brat covered in sauerkraut and onions before boarding a plane and being in close quarters with strangers for several hours.
If you just want a goddamn drink: You have to stop in at Billy's Pub, the closest the airport comes to representing Milwaukee's proud tavern tradition.