Stage fight: Lollapalooza headliners other than Perry Farrell who should book their own stages
Meeno Peluce
Perry Farrell doesn't know the meaning of the word "Why?"
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Throughout its many incarnations, Lollapalooza has always been inseparable, for better or worse, from Perry Farrell, the Jane’s Addiction frontman who first organized the show as a going away tour, and now serves as a carnival barker of sorts for the annual lakefront rock festival. Last year, the event even included a dance stage called Perry’s DJ Stage—didn’t you catch that set by DJ Momjeans, a.k.a. Danny Masterson from That ‘70s Show? It’s now renamed Perry’s, and this year will feature sets from Simian Mobile Disco, Crookers, Kid Cudi, Diplo, MSTRKRFT, and Deadmau5. But why should Farrell have all the fun just 'cause, you know, he founded the damn thing? In honor of the his constant need to remind everyone of his involvement—and add another personal stamp to the event—here are a few of The A.V. Club's visions of what other curated stages, done by some of this year’s headliners, might look and sound like.
The Killers
Stage name: The Last Frontier
After so thoroughly soaking in heartland pathos and black-and-white desert photography for sophomore album Sam’s Town, it’s only fitting the band set up a hometown tribute of sorts. Named after an early Vegas casino and modeled after a seedy Strip nightclub, The Last Frontier would be a small, enclosed space featuring lots of garish velvet and past-their-prime cocktail waitresses. Look for the neon marquee out front, a temporary repeal of the law banning indoor smoking, between-band burlesque shows, and “free drinks for players.”
Possible acts: The Airborne Toxic Event, Ra Ra Riot, Cold War Kids, Peter Bjorn And John
Kings Of Leon
Stage name: Followill Boys’ Rock Revival Tent
Growing up riding across the Bible Belt with their preacher father in a crappy Chrysler, the Followill brothers—Caleb, Nathan, and Jared—have plenty of experience with fire-and-brimstone sermons. Under a wide white tent will be a stage with a lectern and a stained-glass backdrop, octogenarian organ player, choir, and plenty of room for testifying in front. Expect a headlining performance from the Nashville band in white leisure suits.
Possible acts: Fleet Foxes, Bon Iver, Dan Auerbach
Tool
Stage name: Spectare (sponsored by Caduceus Winery)
This heavily influential metal band has a way with visual storytelling, from its early, phallic logo and animated videos to its stage show, which emphasizes videos while singer Maynard James Keenan stays out of the spotlight. Tool's stage (named after the Latin word spectacle) would feature a massive triangular screen peering out over the lake, showing a complex series of visuals and videos directed by guitarist Adam Jones. A Bill Hicks memorial comedy stage—he was eulogized in the Ænima liner notes—would be a nice touch.
Possible acts: No Age, Gang Gang Dance, Rise Against, Yeah Yeah Yeahs