Think local, spook local: 5 Chicago-specific Halloween costumes that don’t suck
Steve Chasmer
The spookiest thing of all is conformity.
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Dressing up on Halloween doesn’t have to be all about mass recognition: A local-inspired costume is likely to go over bigger at a party than any Austin Powers mask and stack of outdated phrases involving the word “shag” could ever hope to. But in scanning the local folklore for escapism inspiration, there are some clichés to avoid in your quest for the perfect costume. The A.V. Club zeroed in on some of the richest touchstones for costumes, and brainstormed a list of dos and do nots.
Historical Costume
Don’t: Al Capone or any other Prohibition-era gangster—the fake Tommy guns are fun, but why dwell on our criminal history?
Do: Daniel Burnham is way more original gangster than Al Capone—forget crime, Burnham could seriously organize some cities, and he rocked a serious mustache. Plus, it's a timely costume: This year marks the centennial of his famed 1909 plan, which we have to thank for our (mostly) unblemished public lakefront.
How: Not everyone has an early 20th-century suit at the ready, but all you really need are some high-waisted men’s suit pants and coat tails. You can dig around at your favorite thrift shop to find what you need (Buffalo Exchange or The Unique might be good starting places), or if you’re more concerned with authenticity you can mail order what you need. Burnham had that portly early 20th-century gentleman-of-means physique, so it might help to pad out your midsection with a pillow. But really, the most important element is the mustache. Start now and work on a nice, thick walrus-style deal that completely obscures the upper lip. If you are a lady or can’t grow a mustache (read: teen), fake will have to do.
Food-Related Costume
Don’t: Chicago-style hot dog—there are few things less sexy than dressing up as a hot dog. Onions and sauerkraut aren’t going to help. However…
Do: Foie gras dog. There are few things more Chicago-savvy than Hot Doug’s; plus, carry along a side of duck-fat fries as part of the costume, and you’ll have no trouble attracting admirers.
How: You can pull this costume off without renting some ugly, cumbersome hot dog suit. Wear light brown leggings and a similarly colored long-sleeved shirt. The costume will work best if you cut the shirt off at the midriff so that you can smear the foie gras directly onto your torso (it won’t stick to cloth as well). Get a hold of a couple of orders of the aforementioned duck-fat fries to carry around with you and voila, no need to worry about representing the bun. Lazy and delicious, a lot like a true Doug's experience.
Abstract Costume
Don’t: The death of Chicago’s Olympic dream. Too soon.
Do: The ghostly aroma of brownie that once haunted West Town. Anyone who's lived here for a while has at some point stumbled into that maddening, delicious, seemingly untraceable Blommer chocolate factory brownie smell around the western part of downtown. Spread chocolaty optimism by turning that scrumptious aroma into a scrumptious and untraceable costume.
How: Sneak behind trick-or-treaters carrying a pan of freshly baked brownies. But that could get awkward, with them being kids and all. Instead, bottle the brownie smell by shaking some brownie crumbs up in a spray-bottle filled with water. A smell has no physical appearance, so just wear regular clothes and hide the bottle somewhere on your person. Furtively blast friends with brownie scent at random intervals. Elusiveness is crucial. Don’t let anyone pin you down as the source of that delicious aroma they’ve smelled all night. Remain vague when people ask what your costume is: “I don’t know, what is my costume?”
Sports-Related Costume
Don’t: Cubs goat. It’s October.
Do: Monster of the Midway—a literal interpretation of the Bears’ nickname makes for a ghoulish costume perfect for Halloween.
How: Bears jerseys are expensive, so it’s best to go with a Bears T-shirt. Paint yourself green and adorn your face with extra eyeballs. The costume will be more fun if you have monster claws or tentacles. You can try papier-mâché or Play Doh to make a good claw and borrow a friend's dreadlocks to make tentacles.
City Landmark
Don’t: Willis Tower. Is a landmark by another name still a landmark?
Do: The Chicago River—which allows more room for sweet ambiguity. Are you going to be kelly green St. Patrick’s day river, or greenish-black every river? Which way will you flow?
How: Dress from head to toe in whichever shade of river you favor. Cut boats and bridges out of felt. If you want to get really detailed, you can even cut out tiny letters to spell out the names of the bridges and make one with an El train crossing it. Attach these felt pieces to your clothing in the appropriate places with a glue gun or needle and thread. For the gold star, string up some dead fish, too. Halloween's no time to make friends.
