Why not the Wesley Willis Tower?
A man and his city can dream.
For 36 years, it’s been the Sears Tower. Now, it's been announced that Willis Group Holdings Ltd., a London-based insurance company, will rent 140,000 square feet of the building, and with that comes re-naming rights. Ladies and gents, welcome the Willis Tower.
Sparking “What’choo talkin’ about” quips all over the Chi-blogosphere, this decision is going over like a lead balloon released from the observation deck. Chicagoans aren’t exactly wild about potential change (i.e. Comiskey Park and US Cellular Field). Plus, what the heck is Willis Group Holdings? Sears—that’s a place you can go to buy lawnmowers and sweaters. Insurance is a little more obscure if it doesn't involve geckos.
In this town, we honor locals and the Chicago way of thinking—Casimir Pulaski, Harold Washington, the Daleys, et al. So, Willis Group Holdings may have forked out the $14.50 a square foot for the office space, but that doesn’t mean we can’t, at least colloquially, rename the tower in honor of one of Chicago’s finest—the legendary musician, artist, and schizophrenic Wesley Willis. Want proof? Check out our tally sheet below and see for yourself.
The basics
Willis Insurance Holdings
The future Willis Tower is 1,454 feet tall, has 110 stories, and “contains enough concrete to build an eight-lane, five-mile-long highway, enough steel to build 50,000 automobiles, and enough telephone wiring to wrap around the world 1.75 times," according to PBS.
Willis Insurance Holdings
The future Willis Tower is 1,454 feet tall, has 110 stories, and “contains enough concrete to build an eight-lane, five-mile-long highway, enough steel to build 50,000 automobiles, and enough telephone wiring to wrap around the world 1.75 times," according to PBS.
Wesley Willis
He stood about 6’5” and weighed anywhere between 300 and 350 pounds. In his drawings, he often inserted his own made-up and self-named building into the downtown area.
He stood about 6’5” and weighed anywhere between 300 and 350 pounds. In his drawings, he often inserted his own made-up and self-named building into the downtown area.
Community awareness and outreach
Willis Group Holdings
According to Willis' website, “In a professional service industry like ours, the ultimate test will always be—and should always be—client service.”
Willis Group Holdings
According to Willis' website, “In a professional service industry like ours, the ultimate test will always be—and should always be—client service.”
Wesley Willis
His client service apparently found head-butting to be a priority. Most of his CD sales were done face-to-face, and Willis was particularly fond of head-butting fans, developing a third-eye-looking round callus in the middle of his forehead after years of this practice.
His client service apparently found head-butting to be a priority. Most of his CD sales were done face-to-face, and Willis was particularly fond of head-butting fans, developing a third-eye-looking round callus in the middle of his forehead after years of this practice.
Disaster management and contingency plans
Willis Group Holdings
Again, according to its website, “Willis was the broker for the Titanic, one of the worst peacetime maritime disasters in history”
Willis Group Holdings
Again, according to its website, “Willis was the broker for the Titanic, one of the worst peacetime maritime disasters in history”
Wesley Willis
Famous for his completely filthy rants about just about anything. Sometimes, he fought the demons in his head and around him while on a "hell ride" (specifically in CTA bus lines) by encouraging them to engage in bestiality ("Drink A Camel’s Cum," "Suck A Cheetah’s Dick") under the premise that even that shit was too messed-up for demons, and they would get off his back.
Famous for his completely filthy rants about just about anything. Sometimes, he fought the demons in his head and around him while on a "hell ride" (specifically in CTA bus lines) by encouraging them to engage in bestiality ("Drink A Camel’s Cum," "Suck A Cheetah’s Dick") under the premise that even that shit was too messed-up for demons, and they would get off his back.
Financial viability in these tumultuous times
Willis Group Holdings
According to its website, “In 2008, Willis Group delivered solid financial performance and demonstrated that our Shaping our Future strategy—specific initiatives designed to drive profitable growth—is working.” What?
Willis Group Holdings
According to its website, “In 2008, Willis Group delivered solid financial performance and demonstrated that our Shaping our Future strategy—specific initiatives designed to drive profitable growth—is working.” What?
Wesley Willis
Though he recorded more than 1,000 songs in his lifetime, Willis had only about $200 saved at the time of his death. While he’d sold out countless shows across the country, it’s unknown what happened to most of the money he earned from recording and playing shows.
Though he recorded more than 1,000 songs in his lifetime, Willis had only about $200 saved at the time of his death. While he’d sold out countless shows across the country, it’s unknown what happened to most of the money he earned from recording and playing shows.
