AUGUST 3
The Bourne Ultimatum
What it's about: Matt Damon reprises his role as the rogue secret agent who uses his wits—not gadgetry—to elude his corrupt former masters. Paul Greengrass, fresh from the triumph of United 93, returns to the director's chair.
Why it might be worth seeing in theaters: Nobody does "you are there" action sequences like Greengrass.
Why you're probably better off waiting for the DVD: Greengrass' apparent disdain for the Steadicam leaves many moviegoers nauseated.
Possible special feature: The deleted final title card, which reads, "Matt Damon's war on terror had begun."
Underdog
What it's about: Disney's live-action remake of the quaint '60s cartoon features Jason Lee as the voice of the sassy super-dog who keeps the world safe from the schemes of Peter Dinklage as Dr. Simon Barsinister.
Why it might be worth seeing in theaters: Misery loves company.
Why you're probably better off waiting for the DVD: Much easier to throw a DVD across the room in disgust than to pull a 20-foot-high movie screen off the wall and launch it across the theater.
Possible special feature: X-rated Easter-egg footage of your childhood being anally violated by this movie.
AUGUST 8
Daddy Day Camp
What it's about: Stepping in for Eddie Murphy—who, amazingly, had better things to do—Oscar-winner Cuba Gooding Jr. reprises the role of a stay-at-home dad who cares for a gaggle of children, this time at summer camp.
Why it might be worth seeing in theaters: We can think of no reason why moviegoers of all stripes wouldn't want to rush out to see this on opening day. Besides, it's directed by former Wonder Years star Fred Savage, whose extensive experience as a child actor taught him how best to bully performances out of little kids.
Why you're probably better off waiting for the DVD: Given that DVD is the natural format for sequels made without key personnel, it's surprising that this movie is coming to theaters at all.
Possible special feature: A two-hour-long appreciation of Gooding Jr.'s post-Oscar career, replete with clips from such enduring classics as Chill Factor, Boat Trip, Instinct, and Snow Dogs.
AUGUST 10
Rush Hour 3
What it's about: The many questions and conflicts left lingering at the end of Rush Hour 2 will all be resolved in Rush Hour 3, which pits mismatched buddy cops Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker against the Chinese triads. Plus the long-awaited pairing of Chan and Max von Sydow.
Why it might be worth seeing in theaters: If Rush Hour 3 doesn't clean up at the box office, Tucker may be forced to make as many as three films a decade for as little as $15 million apiece.
Why you're probably better off waiting for the DVD: Much like the Lord Of The Rings series, the Rush Hour trilogy can only truly be comprehended and appreciated when watched back-to-back-to-back.
Possible special feature: A passive-aggressive documentary illustrating all the schools and hospitals for the impoverished that could have been built with the money that instead went to Tucker, Chan, and director Brett Ratner for their no-doubt-brilliant work here.
Stardust
What it's about: The adaptation of Neil Gaiman and Charles Vess' graphic novel follows callow young Charlie Cox on a trip into Faerie to retrieve a star for the girl of his shallow dreams. Unfortunately for him, evil witch Michelle Pfeiffer wants the star for very different reasons.
Why it might be worth seeing in theaters: The visuals are much of the point of any cinematic fantasy tale.
Why you're probably better off waiting for the DVD: Gaiman's Mirrormask was gorgeous too, but it was kind of a snooze.
Possible special feature: Ten minutes of footage of Gaiman smiling at the camera with a polite charm that makes you feel guilty for anything of his you've ever failed to fully enjoy.
AUGUST 17
Superbad
What it's about: When two co-dependent high-school seniors (Arrested Development's Michael Cera and Jonah Hill) attempt to buy alcohol for a party to impress some girls, the evening quickly goes awry.
Why it might be worth seeing in theaters: Virtually everything producer Judd Apatow (Undeclared, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, Knocked Up) has put his name on lately has been funny, so this comedy—co-written by and featuring Apatow regular Seth Rogen—probably won't be an exception.
Why you're probably better off waiting for the DVD: While teen sex comedies often sound promising, they usually only deliver on the "teen" part. The sex and the comedy tend to cancel each other out, which may explain why Catherine Breillat's Sex Is Comedy isn't a laugh riot.
Possible special feature: A commentary track in which everyone involved in the film crams into a sound studio to laugh at their own handiwork.
AUGUST 17
Wedding Daze
What it's about: The hyper-needy Jason Biggs tries to get over previous romantic disappointments by asking the first woman he sees to marry him. Surprisingly, that woman, Isla Fisher, says yes. Unsurprisingly, she and her family turn out to be a little nuts.
Why it might be worth seeing in theaters: Maybe the print will accidentally contain one of the titles this movie went by on the festival circuit last year: The Pleasure Of Your Company or The Next Girl I See.
Why you're probably better off waiting for the DVD: The comic sensibility of writer-director Michael Ian Black is a little dry for the multiplex crowd.
Possible special feature: Quippy talking-head comments by Black, along the lines of "Oh my God, remember Wedding Daze? I love the '00s!"
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