The Experts

Year releasted: 1989

by Nathan Rabin
September 8th, 2004

Plot:
In the waning days of the Cold War, the KGB operates an imitation American town designed to acclimate agents to American culture. Alas, the suspiciously Mayberry-like burg lags decades behind the times, so agent Charles Martin Smith tricks a pair of dopey New Yorkers (John Travolta and Arye Gross) into helping modernize the town by telling them they're operating a New York-style nightclub in Nebraska. The transplanted Americans then proceed to amaze the Russians with their ultra-advanced technology (a Walkman), slang (Travolta refers to coffee as "bean juice"), and dancing (Travolta moonwalks).

Key scenes:
In the opening sequence, two seemingly typical Americans (Brian Doyle-Murray and Kelly Preston) conduct what appears to be a job interview, until Smith pops in unexpectedly and asks Preston questions about such American esoterica as sushi bars and heavy metal. When she responds that heavy metal is, of course, a "catalyst for plutonium bombs," he quizzes her further on aerobicizing, slam dancing, ghetto blasters, and MTV, all of which he deems essential information for a bona fide American. In a tardy attempt to feign consumerism, Smith later gives the townspeople such American niceties as vibrators, "600 dollars VCRs," computerized chess sets, and sneakers. Sure enough, in the next scene, the townspeople have traded in their small-town ways for garish Miami Vice ensembles, and they're soon limbo dancing, drinking alcoholic beverages served by robots, and leering at scantily clad women.

Can easily be distinguished by:
The Experts sticks with the strange, ostensibly comic conviction that the KGB derived all of its information about the U.S. from reruns of Leave It To Beaver and The Donna Reed Show.

Timeless message:
Once people are given access to Western-style consumer goods, an unquenchable hunger for freedom, sexual liberation, and capitalism will inevitably follow.

Memorable quotes:
When confronted with Smith's radical plan for modernizing the town, reactionary KGB lifer Murray clumsily retorts, "Take your glasnost back to the streets of Moscow, where it's so popular."