There's an old business rule about the importance of "location, location, location," but for some, that rule doesn't quite apply. For example, location isn't particularly important to an entrepreneur wanting to run a mail-order company, which wouldn't need a storefront. Nor is a central, well-traveled location necessary for a bed that consumes all who lie in it. Clearly, for such a bed, walk-ins would be a key part of daily business, but attracting too much attention would threaten the operation. As Death Bed: The Bed That Eats begins, one such carnivorous bed seems to have settled into the basement of an abandoned mansion, a location that satisfies its need to eat while preserving a low-key approach. Sure, the bed's life might seem lonely, but as the opening segment conveys, the occasional hippie couple does stop by to eat buckets of fried chicken and engage in some off-the-beaten-path lovemaking. But it's coitus-interruptus time when their nude thrashing arouses the bed's appetite, causing it to foam at the sheets and draw them into what looks like a Jacuzzi filled with Mello Yello. Not everyone approves of the bed's lifestyle, least of all the spirit of artist Aubrey Beardsley (played by rock critic Dave Marsh, in his only film-acting role to date). Trapped in one of his own works after dying in the bed years before, Marsh watches hopelessly as one hapless wanderer after another falls victim to the bed. "You gaze at me as a painting on the wall," he says. "I see you as a serving on some monstrous silver platter." Flashbacks reveal that the metaphorical monstrous silver platter has eaten well over the years, consuming gangsters and New Age healers alike. Three wandering women seem like more sure victims. But ultimately, they prove to be the death bed's undoing, when one turns out to be a reincarnated spirit. She manages to not only break the bed's evil reign, but also allow the restless spirit of an art nouveau master to finally get a good night's rest.
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