First off, please allow me to apologize for my tardiness in bringing you this recap. I was jet-lagged from my commercial flight. Now that that's out of the way...
Last night's episode was the episode that every... Read Comments: 0
Evidently the girls did have fun on their commercial flight—well, everyone except Fatima, who caught a bad cold on the dirty, dirty, non-catalog, non-couture, Tyra-free flight to Italy. But sickness works for... Read Comments: 0
"Have fun on your commercial flight!" Has there ever been a better dismissal? Those words almost traced a silhouette of a drag queen striking an "Oh snap" pose in the air as soon as they escaped Tyra's mouth. I was waiting... Read Comments: 0
"If You Can't Make It Here, You Can't Make It Anywhere"
I usually ignore the titles of these episodes because, well, it's just one more thing to ignore when watching ANTM, like logic, intelligence, and Tyra's affinity for... Read Comments: 0
Oh, Aimee's a Mormon? Aww, and she was so cute as a little girl, tucked underneath her mom's prairie sleeve and long hair. Well, Aimee, I hope your mom still has hair that long,... Read Comments: 0
Commercial! Couture! Catalogue! Stop: you're all wrong. (The correct answer is Poster Paint Bukkake.)
This episode had nothing to do with those three things, no matter how much... Read Comments: 0
At what point does a metaphor cease to be a metaphor? Is it when a crazed "runway coach" takes you to a fire house in order to illustrate backstage, quick-change chaos at a... Read Comments: 0
Wal-Mart and several Cover Girl products at dawn, the East River and cheesy lingerie at dusk: Tyra really is making use of all that New York City has to offer, right? Maybe... Read Comments: 0
First off, fellow ANTM endurers, allow me to apologize. I was apparently so traumatized by Cycle 9 and/or so immersed in Project Runway and things that aren't television (a few exist), that... Read Comments: 0
"The Girl Who Becomes America's Next Top Model"
The news came down with a resounding "Duh," followed by a series of extended yips and shrieks. America's Next Top Girl Who Does A Series Of Cover Girl Commercials During The Next Cycle Of ANTM, Followed By A Long Career Of... Read Comments: 0
Well, the bitch is dead. Not that it really matters if Bianca's in the competition or not. We all know who's winning this cycle: You can see it in her widely set eyes. You can feel it in... Read Comments: 0
After watching tonight's ANTM I am left with only one question: Who is everyone going to vote for as next week's Cover Girl Of The Week?!? (I'm guessing the 20 regular voters will... Read Comments: 0
Tonight's episode of Top Model was fueled not by Mr. Jay's constructive and conflicting criticism, or by Tyra's ego, or even by some kind of alternative fuel (nice green cycle, Tyra).... Read Comments: 0
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"Just pull it up."
[Dominique giggles. Adjusts Dominique's shirt on Dominique slightly. Stares blankly.]
"Uh, no. You've got to pull it up."
[Dominique adjusts Dominique's... Read Comments: 0