A perfect comedy storm

Forget catching some Last Comic Standing has-been at the comedy club. Forget drink-minimums and fried cheese and performers angling for spots on Dancing With The Stars. Forget your stale assumptions about stand-up comedy and prepare yourself for a shot to the goddamn arm. For the stars have aligned in such a fashion that beginning today a handful of the top performers in the business will grace our fair state in rapid succession, here to pat us on our Mile High heads and assure us, “There, there, little friends, the state of stand-up comedy is just fine.”

Pimping his new book I Drink For A Reason, David Cross—of Mr. Show and Arrested Development fame—will initiate the festivities today in an atypical comedy setting: the Tattered Cover in LoDo. At noon, Cross will read from his book while simultaneously warding off legions of bespectacled, socially awkward disciples; then at 8 p.m., Cross will take to the Paramount. Fans of Cross’ stand-up love him for the vitriolic, enraged indignation he so expertly put forth on his 2004 comedy album It’s Not Funny, but Cross hasn’t released an album since then, and his disciples are hungry for more.

Patton Oswalt’s fans ought to be well fed enough off his most recent outpouring, My Weakness Is Strong, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be any less zealous. Oswalt hasn’t performed in Colorado in years, and in those years he has quietly climbed his way to the top of the comedy heap. And while the masses may still know him best for his supporting role in The King Of Queens or his starring role as the rat in Ratatouille or his latest, dark turn in the movie Big Fan, true fans know him as the man responsible for some of the most hilarious, well-crafted material offered by any comic performing today. Oswalt is truly an artist at the top of his game, and if you miss his show this Saturday, Oct. 3, at the Boulder Theater, quite frankly, it’s because you’re an asshole.

But you can atone by catching Doug Benson Tuesday, Oct. 6, at the Larimer Lounge. Benson is a road-warrior of a comic with the ability to pull laughter from the most absurd of places. And if you miss the fast-rising star of Super High Me, you can reconcile that blunder by catching Michael Ian Black and Michael Showalter Saturday, Oct. 17, at the Ogden Theatre. The former State and Stella comrades just wrapped the first season of their latest Comedy Central offering, Michael & Michael Have Issues, and are taking to the stage in anticipation of a second.

After all this you can retreat back to your couches and your laptop and your funnyordie.com and patiently wait for years for another perfect comedy storm this strong. Because a blitzkrieg of such comedic talent doesn’t roll through town very often; seems like it would be such a shame to miss it.

Asshole.