Cafeteria no more: 5 great reasons to avoid the misery of your food plan
You will never get anything this good from the cafeteria
School is back and, alas, that means that so is school food. You incoming freshmen haven’t experienced the unholy hell that is cafeteria food, but rest assured, it is as bad as you’ve heard. No, worse. Sure, you’re going to be forced to eat most of your meals there, due to constraints both financial and logistical (a fancy way of saying you’re usually both broke and stuck on campus). Eventually you are going to need a break, and we here at The A.V. Club are here to help. We’ve compiled the greatest, college-friendly (in terms of price, location, and awesomeness) hits from the last year of Strangelunch, our weekly food column, for your edible edification. Enjoy!
Denver
Brothers BBQ 568 Washington St., 720-570-4227
In a nutshell: Brothers BBQ is far better than it should be for a place owned by two English dudes.
What to try: The Brother
What we said: The Brother is a raging meatstorm of a meal: a hot link sausage topped with a pile of pulled pork. Cole slaw, jalapeños, and fried onions are added for good measure, too, as if there wasn’t already enough flavor packed inside those buttery buns.
Bonnie Brae Tavern 740 S. University Blvd., 303-777-2262
In a nutshell: This is not gourmet chow. Snooty diners, picky eaters, and other irritating people should stay away.
What to try: The cheeseburger pizza
What we said: What elevates the Bonnie Brae’s real-deal cheeseburger pizza is an unwavering commitment to replicating the cheeseburger experience. To wit: In addition to the typical crust, mozzarella cheese, and ground beef, Bonnie Brae adds American cheese, pickles, and onions. That’s what goes on a burger, so that’s what goes on the pizza. It looks damn fine, considering what it is, and it tastes even better.
Boulder
Zoe Ma Ma 2010 10th St., 303-545-6262
In a nutshell: Zoe Ma Ma’s dishes aren’t typical American Chinese fare. Don’t go in looking for gluey chicken chow mein or greasy egg rolls.
What to try: The CPR
What we said: It’s a curry of sorts, thinner than Indian or Thai curries, with soft aromas of ginger and star anise. Two plump chicken thighs rest atop a heap of rice dotted with chunks of potato. It looks, well, gentle. A forkful of potato confirms it: The tater is meltingly soft and infused with the warm flavors of the curry-gravy. Miraculously, the earthy taste of the spud remains intact as well—it isn’t sodden with sauce. And the chicken? You can cut it with a fork, and it tastes like it was poached in its own broth. Chicken squared!
Half Fast Subs 1215 13th St., 303-449-0404
In a nutshell: Half Fast Subs is anything but half-assed. The shop’s variety is huge, including 10 styles of cheese steak and more than 20 vegetarian options.
What to try: The Gobbler
What we said: This is a fine fall treat in anticipation of Thanksgiving. Slices of turkey breast get slathered in gravy and cranberry sauce, then dabbed with stuffing. The French baguette bread that holds it all together is a good choice for added sturdiness against all the wet stuff. Folks who love to mix up their T-giving dinner plates and mess with flavor combos will love the Gobbler.
Denver & Boulder
D.P. Dough 1228 E. Colfax Ave., Denver, 303-839-9663; 1622 Broadway St. #2, Boulder, 303-444-9663
In a nutshell: D.P. Dough makes a pretty strong case for itself as a unique entity, helped along by a panoply of unusual toppings—er, fillings—that you don’t often find in pizza delivery.
What to try: Hot Hawaiian
What we said: It’s a sturdy shell stuffed with pepperoni, mozzarella, jalapeños, and pineapple. It’s spicy, salty, and sweet, just like it should be, and it comes in its own little box with a generously sized cup of marinara. Gourmet it’s not, but you got to stay in your bedroom slippers and wait for it to arrive on your doorstep, all bundled up like a delicious baby from the baby-stork.
