News Net Weed song lends name to weed bust, ’70s history saved, and more

Since sifting through dull newspapers, hyperbolic blogs, and overflowing RSS feeds for meaningful news can be an arduous process, News Net catches and compiles both the amusing and the significant reports that were overlooked throughout the work week. Here are some things to think about as the weekend begins.

• 16 people were arrested in a local pot bust called “Operation Sweet Leaf.” It was such a success, local drug warriors are gearing up for “Operation One Toke Over The Line” and are taking suggestions for other totally sweet weed songs they can name their busts after.

• A time capsule from the ancient era of 1975 was saved on the final day before the local building housing it—a school that was closed in 2005—was to be demolished. Future historians will no doubt thanks those that took the time to preserve its crucial contents of bell-bottom jeans, smiley face buttons, and eight-tracks full of songs with names that will shortly be appropriated for drug bust operations.

• More than a dozen prostitutes were arrested in a Colfax Avenue-based sting this week, but early reports failed to reveal what famous song about prostitution the police named the sting after. We’re sure it was something clever and not at all obvious, though.

• Fans of hip-hop and freezing their nuts off should be pleased to learn that Red Rocks’ first-ever winter show, featuring Atmosphere and Common, is tonight. If you’re planning to go, remember that drinking until you’re numb from the neck up isn’t actually a way to prevent frostbite, just a way to make sure you don’t mind it as much.

• Two middle school girls in Monument were suspended for 10 days and face possible expulsion after one girl loaned the other her asthma inhaler. While sharing meds is never a good idea, neither is kicking two girls out of school to teach them a lesson, unless the lesson they hope to teach is “Man, adults can be fucking stupid.”