HOLIDAY SALE AT THE ONION STORE

Commentary Tracks Of The Damned

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Apollo 18 

    It’s a cheap faux-found-footage film about killer moon rocks, but at least the director and editor love it. 

    January 30, 2012 | 12:00am -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned The Change-Up (2011)

    That Jason Bateman/Ryan Reynolds body-switch comedy with the pooping and farting? It’s really about the human condition.

    January 9, 2012 | 12:01am -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Conan The Barbarian (2011)

    The stars had fun (and discomfort) selecting women by their breasts and making ballet gestures, but that doesn’t make the latest Conan any more watchable. 

    December 5, 2011 | 12:00pm -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Six: The Mark Unleashed 

    A film about the End Times wasn’t immune to its own tribulations. 

    November 14, 2011 | 12:00am -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned My Soul To Take (2010) 

    Wes Craven endures a giggly, youthful cast in a discussion of his rote, tedious slasher film. 

    October 17, 2011 | 12:00pm -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned The Roommate (2011) 

    Reveling in the magic of Hollywood movies with the director a decidedly non-magical PG-13 thriller. 

    August 15, 2011 | 12:00am -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Drive Angry (2011)

    What do you say after you've made a movie in which Nicolas Cage escapes from hell? How about an endless stream of thanks.

    July 25, 2011 | 12:00pm -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Just Go With It (2011)

    The magic of filmmaking. The boring, boring magic.

    June 13, 2011 | 12:00am -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned The Ruins (2008)

    “It ends up being about suffering, which isn’t always that fun to wallow in.”

    May 23, 2011 | 12:00pm -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Burlesque (2010)

    It took a lot stitching to hold this movie together. And then just barely.

    April 4, 2011 | 12:00am -

  • I Spit On Your Grave (2010)

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned I Spit On Your Grave (2010)

    Why remake one of the nastiest films ever made? Don't look for answers here.

    March 21, 2011 | 12:00am -

  • Snakes On A Plane

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Snakes On A Plane (2006)

    Somebody wanted this motherfucking audio commentary on this motherfucking DVD.

    February 28, 2011 | 12:00pm -

  • Heroes: “Brave New World” (2010)

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Heroes: “Brave New World” (2010)

    Talking through a series' ignoble end.

    February 7, 2011 | 12:00pm -

  • Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Repo Men (2010)

    What’s so funny about Jude Law stealing your organs?

    January 17, 2011 | 12:00pm -

  • Righteous Kill (2008)

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Righteous Kill (2008)

    Why did a team-up between two acting titans fizzle?

    December 20, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • I'm Still Here (2010)

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned I'm Still Here (2010)

    Inside the prank that prompted the world to issue a collective yawn.

    November 29, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • Incubus

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Incubus

    William Shatner and others recall the first, and last, Esperanto horror movie.

    November 8, 2010 | 12:10pm -

  • Equilibrium (2002)

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Equilibrium (2002)

    When the screenwriter behind Sphere and Salt directed his first movie, he loved the film, but hated practically every shot in it.

    October 18, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • Big Money Rustlas

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Big Money Rustlas

    Learn what Shaggy 2 Dope truly thinks of little people and other secrets.

    September 13, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • Furry Vengeance (2010)

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Furry Vengeance (2010)

    What's dumber, this film or the director and star who keep competing to pretend they're dumber than each other?

    August 23, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (2009)

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (2009)

    Troy Duffy would like the world to know that his lead actress makes his pee-pee hard.

    August 2, 2010 | 1:01pm -

  • Spread

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Spread

    July 12, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • Old Dogs (2009)

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Old Dogs (2009)

    The people behind Old Dogs don't realize they made a shitty movie.

    June 14, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • X-Men: The Last Stand

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned X-Men: The Last Stand

    Just keep talking, and maybe everyone will think it's great.

    May 10, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • Did You Hear About The Morgans?

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Did You Hear About The Morgans?

    You know who doesn’t much like Hugh Grant movies? Hugh Grant.

    April 19, 2010 | 12:00am -

  • Outlander

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Outlander

    The Vikings-vs.-aliens movie never found its audience, even though its makers point out that it has something in common with Avatar.

    March 22, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • Uwe Boll’s Far Cry

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Uwe Boll’s Far Cry

    Uwe Boll and others guide us through his latest act of Uwe Bollness.

    March 9, 2010 | 12:00am -

  • All About Steve

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned All About Steve

    What happens when there are more laughs behind the scenes than on screen?

    February 15, 2010 | 12:00pm -

  • First Knight

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned First Knight

    "It probably wasn’t the best idea for me to be directing a movie about the Arthur legend."

    October 13, 2009 | 12:00am -

  • Street Fighter: The Legend Of Chun-Li

    Commentary Tracks Of The Damned Street Fighter: The Legend Of Chun-Li

    Deep thoughts about a dumb videogame adaptation.

    September 29, 2009 | 12:00pm -