K-9 custard and doggy bagels: Special treats for our furry friends

Human residents of Madison have few problems obtaining a mouthwatering morsel, provided they have the scratch. But not even the Essen Haus (514 E. Wilson St., 608-255-4674) will serve a German shepherd, and many urban animals are largely dependent on their companions’ ability to walk upright on two legs (and carry wallets) to get that special sumptin’ sumptin’. Slain by the unfairness of it all, The A.V. Club sallied forth to procure some of the best pet treats Madison has to offer our furry friends.

Michael’s Frozen Custard (2531 Monroe St., 608-231-3500)
Custard for hounds? Pooch guardians can scarf down burgers and hot dogs at Michael’s Frozen Custard, then hook the real dog up with a small tub of “K-9 Custard.” Inquiries about whether the pup custard would be all right for a human to eat were met with raised eyebrows and a long pause. “Well, I suppose you could. But it’s specially made. For dogs.”

Mad Cat Pet Supplies (1012 Williamson St., 608-255-4450)
Never bring a hungry animal to Mad Cat Pet Supplies, a wonderland of pet snacks. It would be tough to hold it back from a gigantic and entirely real cow leg bone. Chicken and turkey livers come packed dozens deep in vacuum sealed bags, and dried salmon snacks are the cat equivalent of Ruffy filets. You can even get chunks of real antler for gnawing, if you can handle having something that gross in your house.

Einstein Bros. Bagels (7062 Mineral Point Rd., 608-828-9788)
It’s a chain, but Einstein Bros. Bagels will sell friends of canines a “doggy bagel” constructed from carob chips, wheat flour, and canola oil. Rover will feel especially included when he sees that everyone gets a brunch bagel. Doggy lattes are as yet unavailable.