Peeling off with Exotic George

Even in these times of hyper-exhibitionism, the art of stripping is no less difficult than it was eons ago when the first cavewoman asked her beau if that was a club in his loincloth or if he was just happy to be returning safely from the mastodon hunt. So on the eve of this most hot-blooded of holidays, Decider sought out 15-year stripping vet George Nicholas (a.k.a. Exotic George). Nicholas owns the stripper agency WisconsinStrippers.com, and regularly teaches erotic dance classes at local sex shop A Woman’s Touch. Here are his suggestions for untrained people hoping to peel it off without making total asses of themselves.

A captive audience
As counterintuitive as it may sound, having the dance recipient blindfolded at the beginning of a routine can aid the dancer in finding his or her comfort zone. After a minute or two of warm-up with no one watching, the blindfold comes off and the gyrating can begin in earnest. Also, just as a blindfold can be a good starting point to foster a feeling of control, handcuffing your partner to a chair sends an even more overt message: “You’re not going anywhere, and if you want to touch me later, you’d best be reacting positively.”
Exotic George: “Control is confidence.”

Keep it Sybil, stupid
If the key to any successful strip routine is self-confidence, another technique to manufacture insta-boldness is for dancers to overdo or exaggerate their normal personalities. This even further transforms them into people they’re usually not, and adds a little role-playing to the festivities. The most inexpensive way to do this is by changing hairstyles and makeup, but for those who want to pull out all the stops, purchase a costume like the pros wear.
Exotic George: “The dirty maid and schoolgirl are always fun to do.”

That damn mirror
Even though everyone enters the world nude, a good stripper is made, not born. So for better or worse, a healthy amount of practice is going to be essential to the whole unclothing enterprise. Practicing in front of a mirror and taking note of what you like and don’t like is an excellent method to work out the kinks. And as a foil to the obvious drag of having to see your own naked, contorted body, real-life fact-finding missions can pay dividends as well.
Exotic George: “Strip-club field research is always fun.”

The old in and out
More critical than what you’re wearing is how easy it is to take off. Knee-high leather boots will draw stares on the street, but if you have to sit on the floor wrestling your feet to get them off, no one in the room is going to be feeling very sexy.
Exotic George: “Always remember, the easier it is to put on, the easier it’ll be to take off.”

Turn it up
A common inclination for unseasoned strippers is to load up the stereo with timeless strip-club standards (see: pretty much every hair-metal song ever). Resist the urge to pour sugar on anyone, and instead find tunes that are up-tempo and motivating. As a general rule, whatever songs you perform to rave reviews in your car and shower will work as crossover hits.
Exotic George: “You can also never really go wrong with the blues. It’s really easy to dance to.”

Put the bottle down
Everyone feels a little better-looking after a couple of drinks, but liquid courage is definitely not the way to go when stripping. One or two to calm the nerves is okay, though anything beyond that is only going to exacerbate any gawkiness. Conversely, this same rule applies to the onlooker. The no-touching rule won’t be in effect, so you’re going to want to be at the top of your game once the dance portion of the evening is over.
Exotic George: “You don’t ever want to get too drunk.”

Showtime
When the time finally comes to put it together and take it all off, it’s important not to overthink or over-choreograph. Always lean toward simple and fun rather than contrived and complicated, use your hands to caress your body as a surefire way to turn up the heat, and know that two or three songs will be plenty to get the job done.
Exotic George: “If you dance too long it just ends up frustrating your partner.”