Back to School The A.V. Club's guide to grazing during welcome week

The period of time between being officially moved in and the first day of classes is an unforgettable slice of campus heaven. There’s so much liberation in the air you can practically taste it, but feelings of freedom won’t nourish the hungry for very long. The A.V. Club raked over the possibilities, and winnowed out the best opportunities for free food on campus in the coming week.

Breakfast
One of the oldest student dilemmas—exploiting free food on campus without being subjected to a boring commercial for classes—presents itself in the School of Human Ecology’s New Student Breakfast (Sept. 1, Grainger Hall) at 9 a.m. The continental breakfast (that probably consists of bagels and juice) might entice you to pursue a major in Consumer Affairs, but don’t make up your mind until you’ve gone to the way better-sounding Faculty Networking Breakfast from 8-9 a.m. (Sept. 2, Grainger Hall). There you’ll be able to meet with high-powered professionals and academics, all while scarfing down a hot breakfast.

Lunch
The quality of life of all campus residents will be raised after a visit to the Kohl Center on Aug. 31. from 12-2 p.m. Rockin’ With Rec Sports will offer free Silver Mine (328 W. Gorham St., 608-286-1000) subs along with literature on maintaining wellness while living in the downtown area. Since this event occurs on the penultimate day before classes begin, it will probably be a godsend to have ideas of healthy living planted firmly in the backs of students’ minds just before they engage in an excessive, pre-responsibility shitshow. A convenient location in the heart of the Southeast dorm area should make stopping at this food and prize giveaway session a must.

Dinner
A trip to State Street on Sunday is a smart move for last-minute textbook acquisition, and without even trying you may end up eating free pizza at New Student Night at the UW bookstore (Aug. 29, 711 State St.), which starts at 5:30 p.m. It’s reserved for freshman and transfer students, but prizes like waffle irons and quesadilla makers are probably best for the dormitory-bound. For those looking for fancier digs, there’s also the Transfer Student Welcome Dinner at the Lowell Center (Sept. 1, 610 Langdon St.) at 6 p.m. You must RSVP online if you plan on going, but such red tape might help drive the deluge of hunger-crazed students adverse to planning ahead elsewhere.

Dessert
Lots of new-student-orientation events promise ice cream to stuff your belly full without emptying your wallet. The ice cream socials hosted on Sept. 1 by the College of Agricultural and Life Science (125 Agriculture Hall) and the School of Education (225 N. Mills St.) end at 11 and 11:30 a.m., respectively. If you plan on talking and checking your phone incessantly it may be best to arrive at the tail end of each event, unless you find yourself highly receptive to faculty members imploring you to take classes in agronomy. Also at 4 p.m. that day is the LGBT ice cream social in the Memorial Union Great Hall, which is a far more reasonable time for ice cream and an excellent end to a week of free food.