Roll Call Better things to do on Black Friday than freezing your ass off for a cheap TV

Thanksgiving is the overlooked middle child of the holiday season. Christmas spent the last century being commercialized, and Halloween is an excuse for retailers to sell sexy versions of any costume they can possibly create. The best Thanksgiving can do is serve as the setup for a monthlong frenzy of shopping. Yes, the day after Thanksgiving kicks off the shopping season with a ritual that involves standing in the cold and staying up all night for half-price TVs or copies of Madden NFL 12. (Anyone who believes that marketing malarkey about how the day is called “Black Friday” because it puts retailers in the black should report to a focus group immediately.) Before this dreaded day arrives, The A.V. Club offers these humble suggestions for other activities that will earn the gratitude of anyone who has worked in retail, ever.

Surrogate dinners
Thanksgiving surrogate dinners have come out of the soup kitchens and into local restaurants and watering holes. What started as an outlet for out-of-towners still looking for a yearly hit of tryptophan has grown to include some excellent options over Thanksgiving weekend. Local spots like Palomino have offered the tradition on Thanksgiving, but plenty of other Milwaukee restaurants offer a second chance at a turkey overdose on the weekend.

Potawatomi Casino
Don’t think of it as spending a few sad hours feeding a Happy Days slot machine while sitting next to somebody’s grandmother. Instead, think of it as giving back for hundreds of years of oppression and dicey treatment of Native Americans in the U.S. Plus, take a second pass at trying to eat your own weight in food at the Dream Dance Buffet. The only downside? The Prince Experience with Gabriel Sanchez is on Wednesday, not Friday. Maybe Nana can hear “Darling Nikki” next year.

Milwaukee Public Museum
The public museum makes for a good choice due to its excellent exhibits about Native Americans, ranging from the buffalo chase to the recently restored pow-wow dance circle. (True Milwaukee natives also know where to find the hidden rattlesnake button.) Showing the location to kids is a family tradition more important than touch football or making sure Uncle Steve doesn’t throw up on the tree this year.

Harley-Davidson Museum
The Harley Museum barely needs an excuse to put together a ride full of enthusiasts. This year’s Yuletide Ride, beginning Nov. 25 at 4 p.m., combines homemade floats pulled by bikes, as well as too many Santas with burly biker beards to count. The campus also features a lot of holiday trees sculpted by local artists, and hosts a drop-off point for art supplies for a discount to get into the museum.

Punkin Chunkin
If you have a TiVo, load up on Discovery Science’s Thanksgiving coverage of the Punkin Chunkin event in Delaware, and enjoy on Black Friday. For those not in the know, Punkin Chunkin is a tawdry mix of rednecks, science geeks, and gearheads competing to build the most impressive machines to toss pumpkins as far as possible. The premise is stupid, but soon the whole family will gather in the room offering expert opinions based on whether the team operating the machine is wearing glasses, beards, or Confederate flags.

Art vs. Craft
Many local businesses have followed the lead of larger stores and offer Black Friday deals. It’s a good thing, since buying locally might wash away some of the holiday-shopping guilt. And while it’s not on Black Friday, Art Vs. Craft on Saturday, Nov. 26 will once again offer hundreds of handcrafted items from dozens of local artisans. Everything from knit goods to reused books is available. It’s a great way to support local artists and pretend a gift was handmade instead of bought.