Gov. Walker tweets about Noah’s Ark, hilarity ensues
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The unsinkable Gov. Scott Walker has never made any bones about his belief in the magic man who lives in the sky and rewards people for being nice. “God’s got a plan for us that, who knows where it might be even beyond just serving as governor of this state,” Walker said back in April, much to the chagrin of folks who thought running Tom Barrett against him in the June recall election was a good idea. But Walker’s faith runs deeper than just some “God’s got a plan” mumbo jumbo: he’s also a true believer in the fable of Noah’s Ark—or, at least he is when the story can be used to take a swing at those meddling Democrats and their damn dog.
Imagine if Noah had needed help from the government to build the ark. It might have never been built.
Yes, imagine that. Also, imagine if the Tooth Fairy needed help from OSHA to properly sanitize children’s pillowcases. What a crazy, mixed-up world filled with fictional characters and ridiculous hypothetical situations that illustrate the ineptitude of the federal government it would be!
But we’ll leave the rest of the snarky retorts to the masses, because Walker’s apropos-of-nothing remark (something Twitter thrives on) inspired a barrage of smirk-inducing replies. Here are some of our favorites: