Great job, Milwaukee! Website names Milwaukee’s downtown one of country’s best, gets stuff hilariously wrong
“Try the Pabst Theater if you enjoy absorbing plays while supporting one of America’s most popular home-grown brews.”
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When we think of Downtown Milwaukee, we think of great restaurants, swanky dance clubs, the hot dog guy on the corner of Wisconsin and Water, the Shops of Grand Avenue (not really), and oral sex. When professional list-making website TopTenz (rhymes with “ExtenZe”) thinks of Milwaukee, however, it thinks of stuff like size, architecture, and “vibrancy.” It thinks of these things so much, in fact, that it placed Downtown Milwaukee on a list of the best downtowns in America, which you should absolutely click on immediately because a website with a “z” in its name mentioned our city on another dumb list and had an intern who has likely never been here whip up three sentences about it and oh God, we’re so lonely, so afraid. Great job, Milwaukee!
To save you the trouble, here’s what TopTenz had to say about our humble downtown:
Milwaukee likely has the smallest urban core on this list, a fact that certainly hurts the city’s ranking. But this lack of size is also a definite asset: the downtown area boasts upscale river walks, one of the country’s most vibrant loft districts, an impressive collection of museums and academic institutions (try the Pabst Theater if you enjoy absorbing plays while supporting one of America’s most popular home-grown brews), and, of course, easy access to the Lake Michigan beach. Furthermore, Milwaukee’s downtown is clean and easy to navigate, with a lake-and-river setting that makes it seem like a more relaxed version of Chicago’s central core.
Now excuse us while we absorb a play at one of our favorite local academic institutions, the Pabst Theater, and enjoy the easy access to the famed Lake Michigan beach. [via Business Journal]
EDIT: A friendly reader has pointed out that the TopTenz list is over a year old, and that the Business Journal story (published today) has been removed. We’ll keep our story up, if only to memorialize a Milwaukee in which the Pabst books plays and it’s easy to get to the beach.