The Hollywood Knights

One of a slew of early-'80s American Graffiti knockoffs, 1980's recently reissued The Hollywood Knights follows the titular motorcycle club as it engages in randy mischief on Halloween night, 1965. Led by a pre-Arli$$ Robert Wuhl, the boys create strangely familiar havoc wherever they go, whether by regularly thwarting the magic career of an obese nerd (Stuart Pankin) or merely spiking the punchbowl at an uptight school function. In addition to Wuhl and his perfunctory band of troublemakers, Knights also includes such coming-of-age-movie staples as the Vietnam-bound graduate (Gary Graham), the college-bound lug (Tony Danza), and the requisite gaggle of adults, on hand to provide an endless supply of eye-bugging, head-slapping reaction shots. Powered by a soundtrack featuring many of classic-rock radio's most comically overplayed songs, The Hollywood Knights has almost nothing going for it aside from a surplus of enthusiastic vulgarity. A veritable cornucopia of clichés, including some of the most dispirited mooning in cinema history, Knights is perhaps the quintessential early-'80s teen-sex comedy. Its plot involves a drive-in, for starters, and there's even ineptly executed premature-ejaculation and dick-stuck-in-zipper gags that predate American Pie and There's Something About Mary by nearly 20 years. A groundbreaking work of crass stupidity, The Hollywood Knights didn't kill off the nostalgic teen-sex romp—Porky's followed two years later—but it probably should have.

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