If there’s one constant on True Blood, it’s that if a character has a plan, it is sure to fail. True Blood doesn’t thrive with grand schemes and order: Chaos reigns, and it’s either adapt or die. This can be exciting, because the story feels like it could go anywhere at any time, but after a while expecting the unexpected becomes a norm, making even so-called shocking events feel fairly rote.
The prime example of this tonight was the climax of the episode, where Russell finally fulfills his dream of drinking fairy blood, the first step in his goal of allowing vampires to walk in the sun. The thing is, the only reason Russell found the fairies so easily is because everyone in Bon Temps is a goddamn idiot. Their plan to defeat him involved Jason, a shotgun, and the new fairy leader’s extensive knowledge of '80s and '90s pop music. Truthfully, their lack of a plan is fine because Russell winning is far more fun than him losing, but the fact that the show even attempts to put such futile barriers in his way is a bit ridiculous. No human—shotgun or no, addled intelligence or no—would think they even have one bit of a shot against Russell. The fairy leader at least had fairy magic on her side. Still, Russell and Steve zipping around a field in the throes of fairy blood ecstasy is always a good time, and Russell’s inevitable showdown with the entire fairy tribe sets up a fun finale setpiece. (But really, Jason, you were going to beat Russell with a shotgun? If you wanted to distract him, you could have at least taken your shirt off.)
While Russell is chasing the sun, the remaining Authority vampires are all chasing Lilith in their own ways. Bill—who is becoming increasingly more irrational with every second he’s under Lilith’s thrall—receives a vision from Lilith telling him he’s the chosen one, the one she wants as leader. This would be fine and dandy if Lilith wasn’t busy telling other Authority members the exact same thing. (She also appears to Salome, which might throw some doubt on the notion that Salome’s blood is what is in the vial.) Bill refuses to accept this, going so far as to kill another vampire to maintain his status. When he’s not killing to maintain his power, Bill spends his time attempting to force Jessica to turn Jason into a vampire and just generally being kind of a dick.
One thing that became clearer this week is that all of Eric’s supposed loyalty to Lilith was just a front, and after seeing Godric last week, Nora is off the Lilith train as well. They get their chance to escape the Authority when a military representative shows up to confront the Authority about their involvement with the Tru-Blood factory fires. Basically, the human brass knows the vampire brass is behind all of the mayhem, and threatens to turn the entire human race into vampire-killing vigilantes if they don’t shape up. Eric takes this opportunity to kill the General and give him and Nora a chance to get themselves outside the compound.
Meanwhile, all paths are converging inside the Authority, as Pam is arrested and taken in to atone for Elijah’s staking and Sam and Luna are still crawling around the Authority compound in their search for Emma. Just when they find her, they are captured by the Authority, and Luna goes into lockup, and Sam volunteers himself as food for Bill.
So we go into the finale with Bill, Jessica, Pam, Sam, Luna, and Emma at the Authority compound, Eric and Nora outside the compound searching for a way to stop them, and Jason, Sookie, and the fairies in danger of being wiped out by Russell and Steve. This penultimate episode was largely focused on getting everyone in place for the finale, but even though it didn’t have the more touching emotional moments of last week’s episode, it had plenty of forward momentum to make up for it. There’s no way of telling how things will shake out next week, but one thing is for sure: If it involves a character making a plan, it’s sure to go down in a massive ball of chaos and failure.
- The fairy leader randomly doing ballet and quizzing Sookie on her musical preferences was bizarre in the strangest, most boring way. But hey, Sookie, what did John Cougar Mellencamp ever do to you?
- The worst job in Louisiana this week is Authority Security, who prove to be absolutely terrible at their job in every way. Even Jason is smarter than them.
- This week on our True Blood/Veronica Mars crossover event: Wallace’s mom!
- Also in this episode, sort of: Alcide, Alcide’s dad, Holly, Andy, Terry, Arlene, and Lafayette. Because if they’re in the main cast, they’re obligated to be in every episode whether it makes sense or not.
- All right, technically Andy's fairy baby might be important next week. But somehow I doubt it.
- “When we die, we’re goo?!”